Employee with cancer: I'm bringing these files back.
Account executive: What…they don't allow files at the hospice?
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Alia
Employee with cancer: I'm bringing these files back.
Account executive: What…they don't allow files at the hospice?
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Alia
Office bimbette: So, my friend got me a Sudoku book, but I can’t start doing it yet because she has to send the Sudoku pencil. It has an eraser on the end — only Sudoku makes them that way.
Auckland
New Zealand
Overheard by: Sarah
Worker guy #1: I love names that are states. Or cities. Madison, Dakota, Georgia…
Worker guy #2: Jordan…
733 Third Avenue
New York, NY
Overheard by: the temp
Arrogant idiot: You see, the older you get, the more geometrically expensive your health insurance gets.
Stamford, Connecticut
Overheard by: my brain is dying
Co-worker: I just walked past the copy and fax machine area, and all the hair on my arms stood straight up like a science fiction movie!
640 5th Avenue
New York, NY
Chief of Plant Operations: We need to disconnect and then reconnect the cash registers from the parking booths. This is high priority.
IT: Huh? Why not just leave it connected?
700 State Drive
Los Angeles, California
Doctor's assistant to doctor: How do you spell “blood”?
Scottsdale, Arizona
Client on phone, returning from lunch: What, we have a meeting now? I’ll be there in ten minutes. Is [the boss] around?
Admin: Yeah, he’s right here.
Client: Good, go kick him in the shin for me.
Admin: Um, you’re on speakerphone.
Client: I hate you! How many times have I told you never to put me on speakerphone!?
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Tech on phone in next cube: How can I help you? … Uh huh. Well like it said in the doc, you have to name the files alphabetically for that to work. … Alphabetically means from A to Z. … No, sir, you can’t name one file code_abc and the next one code_aba, a is before c… Yes, abz would work. … Numbers come before letters. … You’re welcome. [hangs up phone] Fuck this shit, I can’t even smoke it. I’m going home!
800 S Canal Street
Chicago, Illinois
Lady suit: Did you see that chicken?
Male suit: What?
Lady suit: Yeah, the chicken with the keyboard…
Male suit: Um…
120 Fairview Park
Washington, DC
