Female suit to vendor on phone: Oh my god, I’ve been calling you nonstop. I’m like a girl in a white dress at her wedding, and her groom isn’t there, and she’s been calling him for two hours. That’s how I feel.

Union Square
New York City, New York

Overheard by: Julie

Suit #1: All my clients complain that the questionnaire package we require is too onerous.
Suit #2: Really? I never get any complaint about ours.
Boss: Well, have you ever seen his package? Maybe you two should get together and compare packages. 

245 3rd Avenue
New York, NY 

Suit on cell: I don’t want you shooting blanks in the dark…

New York City, New York

Overheard by: Traci C

Suit #1: So how have you been lately?
Suit #2: Eh, you know, overworked.
Suit #1: Yeah, same here…By the way, nice tan you’ve got there.
Suit #2: Thanks, you too.

590 Madison Avenue
New York, NY

Office Manager: You hired her, but you haven’t interviewed anyone else. Is she that qualified?
Suit: Actually no, she doesn’t have any experience working as an engineer.
Office Manager: Then why not interview some other people and see if you find someone better?
Suit: Because I don’t feel like interviewing. Besides, she has a really nice rack so I will at least have something good to look at.

1042 Hamilton Ct.
Menlo Park, California

Lady suit, at lunch: How is it?
Male suit: It needs something.
Lady suit: Perhaps you should have asked for a more aggressive vegetable.

9th Street and Main Avenue
Durango, Colorado

Weird suit: Hey! There’s a box of dead people back here!

Bourse Building
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Suit to other: I just don’t understand why the minority whip is never a minority.

Denver, Colorado

Suit #1: Are you going to the farewell party for [Liz]?
Suit #2: I don’t know yet. Does she know she’s leaving or is it a surprise party?

3 2nd Street
Jersey City, New Jersey

Overheard by: Hobo Whisperer

Lady suit: Well, if she is suicidal, she shouldn’t be traveling alone…
Male suit, staring into distance: Mmm‐hmmm.
Lady suit: … Or drinking alone…
Male suit, staring into distance: Mmm‐hmmm.

Penn Station
New York, New York

Overheard by: passerby