Underling: You’ve got mail!
Financial Analyst: I don’t know that person. All right, I’ll take it.
Underling: There was some white powder in there, but I smelled it; it seemed fine.
Financial Analyst: Well, that’s good. Terrorists don’t use anthrax anymore.
Underling: Just family and friends now, huh? Excellent.
27 Terrace Drive
Vernon, Connecticut
Coworker #1: It’s asking for an account number before it gives you one.
Coworker #2: Uh…
Coworker #1: It says “please enter the number of accounts.”
Coworker #2: Yeah, how many do you want? 1, 2, or 3.
Coworker #1: Oh, I see.
1220 Senlac Drive
Carrollton, Texas
Co-worker on phone: Isn’t someone’s name Forehand on the committee? It could be Foreskin.
3750 Market Street
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Co-worker #1: So, I think I have decided to give up caffeine. But I can’t decide if I should give up liquid caffeine, or sugar caffeine.
Co-worker #2: You should give up the liquid kind.
Co-worker #1: Does that mean I have to give up my coffee in the mornings?
Co-worker #2: Naw, just cut back on the amount of pop you drink.
6700 Antioch Road
Overland Park, Kansas
Student: Can you back up my papers and stuff?
Technician: Sure, how much is there?
Student: About four gigabytes…it’s mostly porn but there are some papers mixed in there somewhere.
16 Petrarca Drive
Kent, Ohio
New Hire #1: So, what time do you think we’ll report to our boss?
New Hire #2: Probably in like an hour?
New Hire #3: No, probably later because we have to take the urine test.
New Hire #1: What? Why do we have to take a hearing test?
New Hire #2: No, the drug test!
New Hire #1: Huh?
280 Park Avenue
New York, NY
Marketing Director: So as we can see, it’s going to be effective with a capital A!
2815 NW 13th Street
Gainesville, Florida
Overheard by: The Evil Overlord
Professor: A “letter of intent”? Whaddya mean, “intent”? I intend on getting myself a sweet little girlfriend like [Nick] has; is that what you mean by “intent”? Get a Korean girlfriend on the side?
San 69-1
Churye 2-dong, Sasang-gu
Busan City, South Korea
Customer: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Vietnam?
Employee: Um…no?
2063 Camden Avenue
San Jose, California
Employee: So Doc, how long before the leg grows back?
Vet: It’s not a freakin’ starfish!
4448 Hendricks Avenuw
Jacksonville, Florida
