General Idiocy

Worker: [The boss] treats me like I’m his little daughter or something. That’s a lot of pressure. I can’t be perfect all of the time.

180 East Ocean Boulevard
Long Beach, California

Front Desk: What does code 99499 mean?
Coder: “You’re a dirty whore.”
Front Desk: They have codes for that?

675 North St. Clair Street
Chicago, Illinois

Office worker: The paper coming out of the printer is really hot! It’s never been that hot before. Can we do something to cool it down?
Tech: Oh, I forgot! I put the summer paper in there! I’ll switch to the winter paper! Give me 10 minutes.

1700 Palm Beach Lakes Boulevard
West Palm Beach, Florida

Tech on phone: Okay, go ahead and type in your password…Yep, just type it in…In the password field…Just type it…With your keyboard…Should be right in front of you… Has letters on it…Great!

3601 SW Murray Boulevard
Beaverton, Oregon

Overheard by: onebadwebmonkey

Candidate: Do you have a listing of job openings?
HR Secretary: Yes, there is a list on the blue piece of paper on the table.
Candidate: Which one?
HR Secretary: The blue piece of paper.
Candidate: This one?
HR Secretary: Yes.
Candidate: I’m not qualified for any of these. Do you have any other positions open?
HR Secretary: Did you turn it over? There are more job listings on the back.
Candidate: Oh.

155 Deer Hill Avenue
Danbury, Connecticut

Underling: What do you think about the new price increase?
Team leader: I think; that’s all I know.

1070 Technology Drive
Venice, Florida

Client on speaker: I need one of those lights that you put on the camera, and a metal thing, and also the curly thing.
Rental Department: So you need a flash, a stroboframe bracket and the off-camera cord?
Client on speaker: Yeah, sure, I guess. Oh, and do you have one of these things that see the light?
Rental Department: A flash meter you mean?
Client on speaker: Sure, I guess.
Rental Department: Sir, are you the photographer?
Client on speaker: Yes, why?

1111 North Cherry Street
Chicago, Illinois

Co-worker: Here comes trouble.
Boss: Get back in your box and shut the lid.
Co-worker: I *am* in my box. I was just sitting here and you came in my box!

10398 Pacific Center Court
San Diego, California

Clinical Services Manager: I hate it when my email is full of porn!
Clinical Services Assistant: Well, at least it’s not kiddie porn.
Clinical Services Manager: Wait, they make porn with cats in it now?

999 Home Plaza
Waterloo, Iowa

Overheard by: RicaChica

Worker #1: Do you have any time available to meet on Thursday?
Worker #2: It will be pretty tough; I have back to back meetings all day.
Worker #1: How about 11AM?
Worker #2: Okay, I have nothing scheduled at all between 9AM and 5PM.

140 Broadway
New York, NY

Overheard by: HardlyWorking