Manager: If it didn’t mean I would have to interview new people I would lobby to have half the staff here fired
2345 Crystal Drive
Arlington, Virginia
Manager: If it didn’t mean I would have to interview new people I would lobby to have half the staff here fired
2345 Crystal Drive
Arlington, Virginia
Boss: What are you still doing here? I told you to go home early.
Employee: I know. Have you ever seen Shawshank Redemption?
Boss: Yes.
Employee: Remember what happened to the prisoner that finally got his freedom? He ended up hanging himself because he didn’t know what to do with his free time.
440 9th Avenue
New York, NY
Boss: She’s gone? And you’re not going to be here tomorrow?
Secretary: Correct.
Boss: But I need counseling.
Designer: I agree!
175 South Third Street
Columbus, Ohio
Administrator: [Les], do you have any overdue surveys?
[Les]: No, I don’t.
Administrator: You don’t have any surveys due before the 26th?
[Les]: No, the only surveys I have were due on the 23rd and the 24th.
811 Russell Avenue
Gaithersburg, Maryland
Boss: Okay, it’s nearly 5, so we’re going to take a different approach to the voting this time. After the meeting minutes are completed, I’ll email all of our ideas to everyone tomorrow, and you can email me back your votes for the best one.
Underling: Are we voting today or tomorrow?
425 Park Avenue
New York, NY
IT Manager: Yeah, he named all of his functions after fish. He was a brilliant programmer, so we let it slide.
149 Cambridge Street
Boston, Massachusetts
Employee #1: Wearing the pinstripe today, eh? Real banker-like.
Manager: Yeah, makes me work harder. But you should see me at 4:30. I’ll be wearing jeans and a sweatshirt and working the park.
Employee #1: Pardon?
Manager: I’ll be selling hot chocolate.
Employee #2: Is that your name there or the product you’ll be selling?
3 King Street S
Waterloo, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: SAM BRUNTON-LEWIS
Underling: What do you think about the new price increase?
Team leader: I think; that’s all I know.
1070 Technology Drive
Venice, Florida
Manager: Good morning ladies. What are you whispering about?
Secretary #1 & #2: You.
11909 Spencer Road
Houston, Texas
Co-worker: Here comes trouble.
Boss: Get back in your box and shut the lid.
Co-worker: I *am* in my box. I was just sitting here and you came in my box!
10398 Pacific Center Court
San Diego, California
