Manager: It gets really cold in our office. I haven’t figured out the reason yet, because I’m not a physicist. I think it has something to do with the air conditioning coming on.
California
Manager: It gets really cold in our office. I haven’t figured out the reason yet, because I’m not a physicist. I think it has something to do with the air conditioning coming on.
California
Defense attorney at deposition: … And before the accident, about how many times per month were you intimate with your wife?
Plaintiff: Um, probably upper 20s.
Defense attorney, incredulous: Upper 20s?!
Plaintiff: Yeah. My wife is Latin.
9th Street
Sacramento, California
NASA intern: Okay, kids, let’s put on our pirate costumes and play spaceman!
Research center
California
Overheard by: shyinvisiblegirl
Admin: We received a brochure for a fog and bubble machine in the mail today… This is cool! Why are they sending us this?
Coworker: Oh, Alan* saw that at the trade show and wanted it. If we had a bubble party, would you show up in a bikini?
Admin: Of course! We’ll file this under ‘Awesome.’
San Luis Obispo, California
Overheard by: blueangelrock
Garbage man to another: I was driving a truck on the on-ramp and I seen a naked guy runnin’ alongside the freeway. I yelled at him, ‘Yeah! Way to go! Naked people are cool!’ It wasn’t like it gave me a chub or anything.
Garbage company
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: the dispatcher whose heard it all
Cute intern reading UPS package label: Hey, Gerald*, you got a big package!
Hollywood, California
Overheard by: fatty
English coworker: I’m just going outside to suck on a fag.
Irvine, California
Overheard by: James
Customer: Could you tell me where the Amaryllis bulbs are?
Clerk #1: Hey, do you know where we keep the bulbs?
Clerk #2: I think they’re on Aisle Four — y’know, with the other electrical stuff.
Clerk #1, to customer: Did you check there? That’s where we keep the bulbs.
Customer: No, no, no — they’re flowers! Do you have any?
Clerk #1: Well, I’m pretty sure we’ve got bulbs. Did you need a three-way one, or a regular one? You should check on Aisle Four, then.
1690 Grande Avenue
Arroyo Grande, California
Overheard by: Blue
IT guy: Someone better jump out of a cake later and scream, ‘Gender surprise’!
Silverlake, California
Suit: So, your friend is Puerto Rican and he’s donating a kidney to a Jew? How can they do that?
California Street
San Francisco, California
