Associate: Dude, I just saw my first hot Wal-Mart employee!
RadioShack
California
Overheard by: DRM
Associate: Dude, I just saw my first hot Wal-Mart employee!
RadioShack
California
Overheard by: DRM
Hospital employee #1: Hey, girl! You going to the club tonight?
Hoochie hospital employee: Yep!
Hospital employee #2: And how are those kids doing?
Hoochie hospital employee: My son has pneumonia, but everyone else is alright.
1600 Harrison Street
Oakland, California
Overheard by: Jefferson Smoyle
Mid-level manager #1: I’ve become a running joke.
Mid-level manager #2: Really? I didn’t know you knew that.
Mid-level manager #1: [Long pause] I just caught on.
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: Cube dweller
Employee #1: What are you doing?
Employee #2: A crossword. What’s the capital of Maine? Is it Rhode Island?
Lombard and Buchanan Street
San Francisco, California
Chick: So, what are you doing tonight?
Dude: Going out.
Chick: Where are you going?
Dude: Somewhere.
Chick: Oh. With who?
Dude: People.
Chick: You’re staying home tonight, huh?
Dude: Yeah…
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: cupcakee
Cube dweller #1: So, you were skinny before?
Cube dweller #2: Yeah, I had a botched hernia. They nicked my bowel — it was like taking a dump on your organs.
Cube dweller #1: Man, that sucks. Didn’t you get a big settlement for it?
Cube dweller #2: No, because I survived. Besides, the old lady got most of it in the divorce.
Cube dweller #1: Man, I’m never getting married.
Simi Valley, California
Coworker on phone: Well, while you’re waiting you should warm up the manatee.
11150 Santa Monica Boulevard
Los Angeles, California
Employee #1: Is it warm outside?
Employee #2: Eh, it’s a little chilly. Grab a sweater.
Employee #3: Or a vest. Or a sweater vest!
Employee #2: Oh, Sally*, no! It’s never sweater vest weather.
1700 Montgomery Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Stephanie
Bookkeeper: He has a monkey! It’s a medically trained monkey. It can dial 911. What it tells them, I’m not sure…
Western Avenue
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: the sugar monster
Peon #1, after dealing with an idiot tech from another company: Maybe she has an extra chromosome.
Peon #2: Are you saying she has Downs Syndrome?
Peon #3: Maybe it’s like in Dune where you have the extra chromosome and you’re super-human.
Peon #2: Something tells me Frank Herbert wasn’t a geneticist.
Peon #1: I don’t know. Some of those retards are really strong. They’ll rip your fuckin’ arms off.
160 South Old Springs Road
Anaheim Hills, California
Overheard by: ApollyonBoB
