10AM Strategy Session

Engineer on phone to pumper: You gotta have the sucking and the blowing. (pause) Does he have liquid? (pause) That's why you gotta keep on blowing and sucking. (pause) Yeah, great, thanks.

Dallas, Texas

Posted on April 7, 2023
Advice, Engineers, On the phone, Sexuality, Texas, Words

9AM Another Week Begins

Engineer: Don’t kill anyone.
Tech Writer: Can I maim them?
Engineer: Yeah. If you maim them you seem like more of a team player.

1550 Buckeye Drive
Milpitas, California

Posted on November 4, 2022
California, Death, Engineers, General Idiocy, Violence, Writers and Editors

With My Teatometer

Engineer #1: Hey, where is your bush gauge?
Engineer #2: I keep it on the top shelf.

Indianapolis, Indiana

Overheard by: At the keybored

Posted on October 14, 2022
Body Parts, Engineers, Indiana, Questions, Technology, Weirdness

Just Like It Says in All Of Our Job Descriptions

Facilities manager to entire staff: And for the men in the office, please don't spit chew into the urinals, as it can clog the pipes and is very difficult to remove.
Engineer, joking: Oh, I see, single out the men. What about the girls?
Female QA manager, who actually chews: We don't spit, we swallow.

Boise, Idaho

Overheard by: testcenter cowboy

Posted on September 29, 2022
Bosses, Compare and contrast, Coworkers, Engineers, Idaho, Meetings, Questions, Restroom, Sexuality

I’m Going to Call You Back Using a Fake British Accent

Engineer on phone: Hi, this is Jim from [Company A]. Oh, wait, that’s you. Shit.

Paterson, New Jersey

Posted on August 26, 2022
Default, Engineers, Lies, New Jersey, On the phone, Science and engineering, Weirdness

Engineers