Junior Boss: I once crashed a car into a tree for the insurance money.
31401 Via Della Pace
Vicenza
Italy
Overheard by: Lorelie Long
Junior Boss: I once crashed a car into a tree for the insurance money.
31401 Via Della Pace
Vicenza
Italy
Overheard by: Lorelie Long
Manager: Thank you, you are an officer and a gentleman.
1175 Peachtree Street NE
Atlanta, Georgia
Specialist: This guy’s name is September…that can’t be right.
Boss: Not in January, it isn’t.
2929 North Mayfair Road
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Specialist: He thought it was “unfair” that we’d charge him a fee for cashing out his certificate before the maturity date.
Boss: He’s lucky he was talking to you. I’d have told him, “I had to put my cat to sleep last night; that’s unfair.”
2929 North Mayfair Road
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Suit: We don’t need to do that right away, we can do it tomorrow.
Boss: We should do it today. Why put off until tomorrow what we can do today?
Suit: I was thinking about killing you yesterday.
3 2nd Street
Jersey City, New Jersey
Overheard by: Hobo Whisperer
Manager: We’re totally gonna win! We’re gonna build the holiday tower of pain!
101 Truman Avenue
Yonkers, New York
Boss: [Elizabeth], we wish you the best. You are a nice person and if you ever want to come back to work here, you are welcome. Now where is [Rachel]? [Rachel], do you want to say a few words? Because I can only comment on [Elizabeth] as a person, not her work.
1425 New York Avenue NW
Washington, DC
District Supervisor: Wait, maybe I misunderstood him, but was he saying “Bachelor’s Degree”?
Regional Manager: Actually, the words he used were “Bastard’s Degree.”
District Supervisor: Ha, ha! I thought so but I didn’t think he could be that ignorant.
Regional Manager: Well, he is a retarded ex-con with personality disorders.
District Supervisor: Yeah, you’re right.
3651 Cedarcrest Avenue
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Overheard by: Joshua Carpenter
Co-worker #1: I don’t want to drive you home; it’s way out of my way. Just take the company van home.
Co-worker #2: If I had a dick I would tell you to suck it.
General Manager: Hey, not in the office.
Co-worker #2: You too.
839 Marshall Phelps Road
Windsor, Connecticut
Employee: What are you doing? Are you okay?
PR Manager: Ugh…Stretching. I slipped on the subway this morning.
Employee: Oh, it looks like you’re trying to…never mind.
11 Hanover Avenue
Boston, Massachusetts
