Two real estate agents are returning from lunch.
Experienced agent: You’re never going to make any money if you keep getting drunk like this.
73 West 19th Street
New York, New York
Two real estate agents are returning from lunch.
Experienced agent: You’re never going to make any money if you keep getting drunk like this.
73 West 19th Street
New York, New York
Portfolio Manager: She’s pissed that I didn’t sell the stock before it
went down.
Trader: Don’t you know that you are supposed to know when that’s gonna
happen?
Portfolio Manager: I guess not…
1900 East Ninth Street
Cleveland, Ohio
Manager: You all need to help out and pull a shift in the Concierge Department. This is what team work is all about. I make too much money to help in the Concierge Department.
47 East Beaver Creek Boulevard
Avon, Colorado
Employee #1: I don’t know what to write.
Employee #2: How about, “I’m surprised you cheap skanks chipped in ten bucks a piece”?
Employee #1: …I was thinking more, “I am sure I will get a lot of use out of this.”
327 West Michigan Avenue
Kalamazoo, Michigan
Assistant on phone: One time I was in Oklahoma and I don’t know if they do this anymore but they had a prisoner rodeo! They would release bulls into a pen and the prisoners had to get $100 bills stuck in the fences. Some would die but it was cool!…I mean, not that I would go again or anything.
900 North Michigan Avenue
Chicago, Illinois
Project Engineer: If you expect me to do quality work I’m going to need a raise.
10 West Mifflin Street
Madison, Wisconsin
Junior Boss: I once crashed a car into a tree for the insurance money.
31401 Via Della Pace
Vicenza
Italy
Overheard by: Lorelie Long
Specialist: He thought it was “unfair” that we’d charge him a fee for cashing out his certificate before the maturity date.
Boss: He’s lucky he was talking to you. I’d have told him, “I had to put my cat to sleep last night; that’s unfair.”
2929 North Mayfair Road
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Sales: You quoted 3 different prices to this customer.
CEO: You’re not calling me an idiot, are you?
Sales: I’m saying that having been given all the facts you made 3 incompatable decisions.
CEO: That’s sufficiently blameless.
12819 Coit Road
Cleveland, Ohio