Engineer: It’s probably a computer that likes to see abstract choices.

Translated from the Dutch.

10 Wissenstraat
9200 Dendermonde

Overheard by: Bart Verhofstadt

Desk monkey #1: I heard she and her boyfriend had Brazilian waxes done together. The man’s treatment is called the ‘free willy wax.’
Desk monkey #2: Oooh! Can you do that? I mean, you can’t wax a man’s balls!


Overheard by: Ouch!

Office worker: Do you know what that meeting was about?
Manager: Nope.
Office worker: But, what did we talk about?
Manager: Don’t know, don’t care, anyway, the cookies were nice.
Office worker: They were, weren’t they?

The Hague
The Netherlands

Overheard by: bewildered

Secular Muslim salesgirl #1: What do you think of what I am wearing?
Secular Muslim salesgirl #2: I'm glad you asked, it's bizarre. Why are you wearing such a short skirt? It's winter! And is that shirt actually lingerie? And why are you wearing a veil? Especially with all this? I've never seen you wear a veil!
Secular Muslim salesgirl #1: My grandmother put glue in my shampoo bottle to try to force me to cover my hair and dress more conservatively. I didn't have time to fix it. I had to wear a veil. And the rest… well, I couldn't let her win.

Clothing Store
Bosnia and Herzegovina

Employee #1, on phone: Good morning, sir, my name is Brad*, and I’m from an execution service agency.
Employee #2: Dude. It’s executive search agency!

Den Bosch
the Netherlands

Overheard by: Meme

30-something coworker, happily: So they tell me it's herpes in my eye. I know! They've given me Zovirax for it.


Overheard by: Thomas van Alphen

Boss: We never decided to postpone this issue. We just agreed that we would deal with other issues first.

Brouwersvliet, Antwerp, Belgium

(at a three day workshop)
Suit #1: I don’t think I can sit through another afternoon of this.
Suit #2: It’s not as bad as yesterday. I’m finding it quite interesting.
Suit #1: That’s what you call Stockholm Syndrome, when you start to love your kidnapper.


Salesperson: But yeah, I agree with you — you should really stop pissing on my shoes when we go to the toilet together.

Reihstrasse 28
Aachen, Germany

Overheard by: PW

Woman: My purse looks pregnant.

The Netherlands

Overheard by: Trying to work but laughin' my but of :P