I Can't Get it Up for Phone Sex, Either

Coworker on phone: So are we okay or is it squishy?

Atlanta, Georgia

Posted on August 4, 2023
Compare and contrast, Georgia, On the phone, Relationships

So Are We Just Chitchatting, or Are We Robbing This Bank?

Guy #1: [Scratches his chest.]Guy #2: You ok?
Guy #1: Yeah… My chest itches. I shaved it.
Guy #2: You shaved your chest?
Guy #1: Yeah.
Guy #2: Why? That’s not like shaving your balls… You shave your balls, right?
Guy #1: Oh yeah, I shave everything below my belly button.

Mahwah, New Jersey

Posted on July 31, 2023
Body Parts, Compare and contrast, Coworkers, Default, Health & Hygiene, New Jersey, Questions

She Laughed All the Way to the Free Clinic

Barmaid: I know, but it’s funnier as an STD.

Seattle, Washington

Posted on July 30, 2023
Blue Collar, Compare and contrast, Default, Health & Hygiene, Washington

To Their Sims Avatars, Anyway

[In a crowded computer room]Female: Dude, nobody in here even likes you.
Male: I have made love to everyone in this room!

West San Antonio, Texas

Overheard by: CCRadio

Posted on July 20, 2023
Compare and contrast, Coworkers, Cubicles, Default, Employees, Feelings, Sexuality, Texas

The TheraFlu Commercial That Was Banned in Louisiana

Customer: I need the cold and flu meds that I have to be logged into a data base for.
Pharmacist: Well, can you tell me your symptoms?
Customer: Well, I'm sore and my head… it's like my whole head is just like… like someone sat on my face… but not in a good way.
(pharmacist gives deadpan face and goes to get meds)
Customer: You know, like a big fat person sat on my face… head. Do you take debit?

Mandeville, Louisiana

Overheard by: ShiftSuper2theSTARS

Posted on July 5, 2023
Body Parts, Compare and contrast, Customers, Employees, Health & Hygiene, Louisiana, Offers and requests, Sensory Experiences, Weirdness

But If You’re Looking for Good First-Date Conversation, Erectile Dysfunction’s the Way to Go

Data manager to minion: Body parts aren’t nearly as uncomfortable as homicide.

New York City, New York

Overheard by: AureateCalyx

Posted on July 4, 2023
Body Parts, Compare and contrast, Death, Default, Employees, New York, Weirdness

…And for All the Googling I'll Inevitably Do Later.

Guy #1: Have you ever thought about a vagina being like an “inverted” penis?
Guy #2: No.
Guy #1, continuing anyways: That way, if you were to “hit bottom” on a girl, that would mean that your penis was technically “bigger” than hers.
Guy #2: I want to kill myself for having been involved in this conversation.

Joplin, Missouri

Posted on June 22, 2023
Body Parts, Compare and contrast, Friends, Missouri, Questions, Sexuality, Weirdness

Shouldn’t We at Least Try to Cater to the Semi-Literate?

Intern: So do any celebrities subscribe to our magazine?
Circulation guru: Actually, James Caan and Shirley MacLaine are longtime subscribers. Even Dennis Hopper got our mag for awhile.
Intern (sighing): I mean like real celebrities. You know: Tila Tequila or Zac Efron…

Los Angeles, California

Overheard by: ugh.