Co-worker: Is these discs recorderable overable?
Rubislaw House
Anderson Drive
Aberdeen, Aberdeenshire
UK
Co-worker: Is these discs recorderable overable?
Rubislaw House
Anderson Drive
Aberdeen, Aberdeenshire
UK
Project Engineer: If you expect me to do quality work I’m going to need a raise.
10 West Mifflin Street
Madison, Wisconsin
Worker: [Bryan]’s sick today; he IMed me and said he needs one of us to come to his house and give him a sponge bath.
1831 Chestnut Street
St. Louis, Missouri
IT Manager: Yeah, he named all of his functions after fish. He was a brilliant programmer, so we let it slide.
149 Cambridge Street
Boston, Massachusetts
Staff: Hey, can one of you help me fix–
IT: Go away before I replace you with a very small shell script.
7117 Florida Boulevard
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Overheard by: CP
Co-worker #1: Don’t you think the enter key is kind of phallic? You know–how it’s all “enter” with an arrow pointing?
Co-worker #2: Huh. Yeah. Weird.
Co-worker #1: And there’s the backspace button too. Arrow points the same way.
Co-worker #2: Yeah, maybe that’s so gay people don’t feel left out?
350 Madison Avenue
New York, NY
Assistant: How about an update on the report for the database we talked about last week? Have you gotten to that yet?
IT: I’m not sure which one you’re talking about.
Assistant: Well, currently there is a cross-tab that displays home addresses and a cross-tab that displays financial aid, but we need a report to show us the student records by state with home address, and we need a find-sort for all students with financial aid and a hold on their account.
IT guy: …Um, I couldn’t tell where that sentence began and where it ended.
Dean’s assistant: Neither could I.
633 Main Street
Burlington, Vermont
Front Desk: What does code 99499 mean?
Coder: “You’re a dirty whore.”
Front Desk: They have codes for that?
675 North St. Clair Street
Chicago, Illinois
Office worker: The paper coming out of the printer is really hot! It’s never been that hot before. Can we do something to cool it down?
Tech: Oh, I forgot! I put the summer paper in there! I’ll switch to the winter paper! Give me 10 minutes.
1700 Palm Beach Lakes Boulevard
West Palm Beach, Florida
Tech on phone: Okay, go ahead and type in your password…Yep, just type it in…In the password field…Just type it…With your keyboard…Should be right in front of you… Has letters on it…Great!
3601 SW Murray Boulevard
Beaverton, Oregon
Overheard by: onebadwebmonkey
