Eight‐year‐old girl running up to her mother in line: I’m 13, and you don’t know me!

JC Penney
Eugene, Oregon

Liaison: I need you to look at this with your anal eye.

12447 SW 69th Avenue
Portland, Oregon

Co‐worker #1: What is a good exercise for the lower abs?
Co‐worker #2: Well, I can think of one exercise that’s really good for the abs…
Co‐worker #3: yeah, but only if he can last longer than 5 minutes. 

The copy repairman pops out from under the copier.

Repairman: Well ladies, it’s been an entertaining afternoon.

8565 SW Beaverton‐Hillsdale Highway
Portland, Oregon

Confused coworker on phone: My day? I just found out that the lead singer of Rush isn’t a girl.

Portland, Oregon

Office clerk: Wait, this doesn’t look right.
Manager: It has to be right ‑it’s highlighted.
Office clerk: Maybe someone highlighted the wrong thing, because that’s not right.
Manager: I highlighted it.
Office clerk: Well, I think it may be wrong.
Manager: It can’t be wrong. It’s highlighted.

5th Avenue
Portland, Oregon

Overheard by: Saw the Light

Coworker: Bon jovi’s on American Idol?! Good god, this calls for a new pack of batteries and the tv on in the bedroom!

Portland, Oregon

CSR to IT guy carrying video camera on tripod: Hey, it’s tripod man!
IT guy: What else can I say but thanks!

Insurance Office
Portland, Oregon

Overheard by: Dadn8tr

Worker: Yup, it takes a lot more than a million dollars to be a millionaire these days.

Hermiston, Oregon

Boss of technology dept: The speaker on my phone doesn’t work.
Employee: Why don’t you switch it with the one in the conference room?
Boss: But then I won’t have the same phone number.

Beaverton, Oregon

Overheard by: i need a cocktail

Coworker, hanging up: I am the Tiger Woods of mortgage lending.

Portland, Oregon