Blue Collar

Cube neighbor, after getting off phone with daughter: Oh, my kids!
Warehouse employee, walking by: We should all kill our kids. Oh, wait, did I say that out loud?

Irvine, California

Overheard by: scared cube‐dweller

Co‐worker #1: What is a good exercise for the lower abs?
Co‐worker #2: Well, I can think of one exercise that’s really good for the abs…
Co‐worker #3: yeah, but only if he can last longer than 5 minutes. 

The copy repairman pops out from under the copier.

Repairman: Well ladies, it’s been an entertaining afternoon.

8565 SW Beaverton‐Hillsdale Highway
Portland, Oregon

Repairman on phone: Sometimes they bust out and you’ve got to give them oral…

1200 West Main Street
Tomball, Texas

Overheard by: Sarah Lashley

Warehouse worker: Can you fax this document to a P.O. box for me?
Shipping clerk: Usually I would “fax” this to a P.O. Box for you [Gina], but my fax machine is down right now. So maybe you should “buy” a stamp and use the Postal Service for this one!
Warehouse worker: Oh, okay, thanks for the help. Where do we keep the
stamps and who works in the Postal Service?

495 3rd Street
Pineville, Louisiana

Overheard by: Lesn N. Tothem

Amtrak conductor #1: There’s no quiet car on this train, folks.
Amtrak conductor #2: That’s right. This is the party train. We gonna get arrested tonight.

South Station
Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: enigmattic

WASP: I know what that says! It’s written in Jewish!
Bagel wench: Yiddish?
WASP: Are you Jewish?

Noah’s Bagels, Manhattan Beach Boulevard
Manhattan Beach, California

Overheard by: just wants to make bagels in peace

University maintenance worker, over walkie‐talkie: I was just talking with Lisa, and she says she has like a weird smell in her room. So I was gonna ask if you could come over here and help me smell it.


Overheard by: It takes two people?

Englishman: Can I have a tablespoon, please?
Puzzled waitress: Is that a spoon?

University and 30th Street
San Diego, California

Overheard by: Zombie

Fire chief to maintenance worker: I need one with a big bottom, so it doesn’t flip over.

Washington State

Admin assistant to African American maintenance guy: Hey, what was that 17 inch black thing you said you needed?

Inkster, Michigan

Overheard by: Wish I hadn’t heard it