Boss on phone: If I ever do something that dumb again I want you to hit me. Hit me like a woman!
1621 18th Street
Denver, Colorado
Boss on phone: If I ever do something that dumb again I want you to hit me. Hit me like a woman!
1621 18th Street
Denver, Colorado
Junior Help Desk Agent: Nothing makes her happy. All she does is complain. I would hate to be her husband.
Senior Help Desk Agent: Uh, Joe, that is the speakerphone button, not the on-hold button.
User on speaker: Do you think you can stop ranting and help “the bitch” now?
8001 Development Drive
Research Triangle Park, North Carolina
Overheard by: EL Gee
Attorney on phone: I’m good, [Jeff]. I’m riding my bike with a glass of wine in my hand on my way to a strip club…No sorry, I don’t know anything about that. I’m too busy mismanaging my files and harrassing my staff to get to that.
999 3rd Avenue
Seattle, Washington
Co-worker on phone: Hello?…Do I have a minute to come up for a second?
385 Benedict Street
Port Townsend, Washington
Worker on phone: When can you come in today?…Well, I don’t know how long it takes to file an Apprehended Violence Order.
94 Todd Street
Alice Springs, Northern Territory
Australia
Overheard by: Daniel Waudby
Worker on cell: Sorry about that. I had a pencil in my hand and when I
put the phone to my head, I stabbed myself in the face.
1950 Summit Park Drive
Orlando, Florida
Admin on phone: Hi [Jeff], I’ve sent you 4 emails and left you 3 messages. Today is my birthday. What I really want for my birthday, more than anything else, is for you to call me back and answer my questions. Thanks. Bye.
10550 N Torrey Pines Road
La Jolla, California
Assistant on phone: One time I was in Oklahoma and I don’t know if they do this anymore but they had a prisoner rodeo! They would release bulls into a pen and the prisoners had to get $100 bills stuck in the fences. Some would die but it was cool!…I mean, not that I would go again or anything.
900 North Michigan Avenue
Chicago, Illinois
Co-worker on phone: Let’s take the new Financial Controller from [the client] out to lunch. Is she cute?…Oh, it’s a guy…Does he have a sense of humor?
680 George Street
Sydney, New South Wales
Australia
Receptionist on speaker: I’m sorry. [Chris] is still on the phone. Would you like his voicemail?
Customer: No. I am afraid he won’t call back, and this is an emergency.
Receptionist: I can put you on hold again. But he has had a lot of calls today, and I don’t know how long it will be before you can speak to him.
Customer: I would like to kick his butt.
Receptionist: I’m sorry. You will have to stand in line to do that.
5711 East FM-40
Lubbock, Texas
