Geography & History

Regional Director: So our biggest problem last year was we tried to take over the whole world, and the whole world is a big place. We need to think small, concentrate on taking over individual countries first…like Wisconsin.

2100 South Priest Drive
Tempe, Arizona

Producer: My friend went to the Galapagos Islands and was astounded. They have birds called blue boobies. Google “blue boobies”. You’ll see pictures of them.
Suit: I’m not searching for blue boobies on my computer. I’ll get called into the office for a talk.
Producer: Oh, I’ll do it…see?
Suit: Wow, who would have thought that would’t have brought up a porn site?

1910 South Highland Avenue
Lombard, Illinois

Co-worker: Oh, I keep having these irrational dreams too. The other night I dreamt that I made this little mistake and it brought down like the entire company. And in the papers it said, “entire company went down because of this one stupid assistant!” And everyone knew my name and I couldn’t get a job anywhere, so I have to move to Europe and marry a guy to get my visa. Then I was a product of domestic abuse because he knew I was co-dependent on him.

175 5th Avenue
New York, NY

Overheard by: Peter H

Girl: So Friday’s your last day?
Guy: Yeah, I’ll be working closer to home. I have an hour long drive to get here from my house.
Girl: Good thing you’ll be working closer to home. Traffic will suck your soul.

800 South Douglas Road
Coral Gables, Florida

CSA #1: So today is the official start of winter. Who cares?
CSA #2: To some people that is important.
CSA #1: Like who, bears?
CSA #2: To some people it’s a winter holiday
CSA #1: Like who, Canadians?

1000 Semmes Avenue
Richmond, Virginia

Overheard by: Chastain

Suit #1: Over on 49th, there’s a truck parked with a bunch of girls dancing in bikinis. It’s to promote Cancun.
Suit #2: For you it’s to promote a heart attack.

383 Madison Avenue
New York, NY

Customer: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Vietnam?
Employee: Um…no?

2063 Camden Avenue
San Jose, California

IT person: “New Jersey”? New Jersey is a state? I thought it was part of New York.

Grand Pavilion
Cayman Islands

Suit: You’re Asian, so I bet you want tea. We Americans like our morning coffee.
Asian interviewee #1: No, I had Starbucks on the way here.
Suit: We Americans like milk in our coffee. Asians drink it black, right?
Asian interviewee #2: No, I take mine light and sweet.
Suit: Well, you still wanna work here, right?

Midtown
New York, New York

Overheard by: Laughing in America

Suit #1: He was an okay analyst and he knew a lot about the markets, but–
Suit #2, interrupting: –So what was the problem?
Suit #1: Well, he was from the South so he couldn’t write very well.

110 Wall Street
New York, New York