Feelings

[In a crowded computer room]Female: Dude, nobody in here even likes you.
Male: I have made love to everyone in this room!

West San Antonio, Texas

Overheard by: CCRadio

Coworker standing on table: I feel like I'm dead and I'm watching over you.

Orlando, Florida

Director: I feel so bad for Sarah!
Intern: Who?
Director: Sarah, from [xyz] Corp! She got fired!
Intern: Oh, that's terrible.
Director: I feel so bad! And she only has one arm!

New York City, New York

Matthew McConaughey’s mother: I wish you were Woody Harrelson. He always has better pot than you.

Patrick McConaughey: I fucking hate you too, mom. [out the window] Hey babe… don’t you know who I am?

Matthew: You people bring me down.

Backseat of the car I was driving
Austin, Texas

Female suit to vendor on phone: Oh my god, I've been calling you nonstop. I'm like a girl in a white dress at her wedding, and her groom isn't there, and she's been calling him for two hours. That's how I feel.

Union Square
New York City, New York

Overheard by: Julie

Boss, interrupting serious discussion on Risk Management: I’m feeling frisky!

Atlanta, Georgia

Boss, looking at St. Patrick's parade: Oh, look, it's the St. Patrick's parade, I just love Greek food!

Neptune, New Jersey

Overheard by: Karen

Kitchen grunt: You ever poop and suddenly find the world a better place?

Main Street
Greenwood, Indiana

Overheard by: RDC

Frazzled accountant: So yes, please mail me the statement ASAP! Yes, thanks, thanks. Okay, love you.
(after a minute, to peon)
Did I just say “I love you”?

California

Geeky IT guy: How can you hate fonts?

Memphis, Tennessee

Overheard by: indifferent to fonts