Financial Folk

Underling: You’ve got mail!
Financial Analyst: I don’t know that person. All right, I’ll take it.
Underling: There was some white powder in there, but I smelled it; it seemed fine.
Financial Analyst: Well, that’s good. Terrorists don’t use anthrax anymore.
Underling: Just family and friends now, huh? Excellent.

27 Terrace Drive
Vernon, Connecticut

Sales engineer: Hey, you can’t use that, that’s a sales punch!
Accountant: Care to see a finance punch?

59 Marsh Lane
Solihull, West Midlands
UK

Banker: You can’t leave your coffee cup on the edge of my desk. A client almost drank out of it today.
Secretary: You know you want to lick my rim.

2 South Main Street
Youngstown, Ohio

AR person: You gotta love it when they send in a prayer card with their check.

1250 Broadway
New York, NY

Perky new faculty member: Hi! I'm Marie*! It's nice to meet you.
(everyone exchanges handshakes and sits down)
Confused accountant: I'm sorry, do you work here?

Pennsylvania

Overheard by: justwords77

Your Editors Were Shock-G-ed to See How Long Ago That Was

Business analyst on phone: Hey, what do you need? The name of the user guide? It's the digital one… No, the digital guide. You know, like Digital Underground, only without Tupac… No, biggie wasn't in Digital Underground… Humpty Hump was… No, the guy with the gold nose… Okay, it's “h”… “u”… “m”…

Chantilly, Virginia

Overheard by: CubeRat

Bank teller #1: So what did you do?
Bank teller #2, wearing name tag that says “Sue*”: I told him my name was Kelly and I ran!

Dayton, Ohio

Accounting coworker: Nothing gets me hotter than a pivot table with five attributes.

Washington, DC

Accounting: You submitted a payment request for a renewal fee.
Peon: Yes.
Accounting: Can you find out how long the renewal term is for?
Peon: It says “annual renewal fee” on the invoice.
Accounting: Yeah, I saw that, but do you know when it’s valid until?
Peon: It says valid from October 31, 2005 on the invoice.
Accounting: Yeah, but can you make sure? You never know it could be for like two years or something.

3700 Wilshire Boulevard
Los Angeles, California

Frazzled accountant: So yes, please mail me the statement ASAP! Yes, thanks, thanks. Okay, love you.
(after a minute, to peon)
Did I just say “I love you”?

California