Financial Folk

Frazzled accountant: So yes, please mail me the statement ASAP! Yes, thanks, thanks. Okay, love you.
(after a minute, to peon)
Did I just say “I love you”?


Purchasing: Hey, can we print from Word?
Marketing: Ah…What?

2801 Red Lion Road
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Broker: I’m going to grab some lunch; if my wife calls, tell her I’m not going down tonight. She’ll just have to wait until tomorrow.

250 West Pratt Street
Baltimore, Maryland

Banker: Yeah, he’s losin’ his eyesight…He can barely see now. He’s got that immaculate degeneration or whatever it’s called. But he still builds things with power tools. It’s pretty amazing…but kinda scary.

200 Nationwide Boulevard
Columbus, Ohio

Bank teller: Ma'am, from now on if you want your balance you'll need to request it.
Customer: How do I request it?
Bank teller: Well, ma'am, you just ask me for it.

Houston, Texas

Products VP: Everyone who makes this crap is just as fucked as we are.
Finance VP: If only no one put this in their mouths…

Elmsford, New York

Overheard by: Bored Beyond Belief

Assistant: They’ve already designed the corn maze for a Lewis & Clark theme.
Account executive: Why did they choose Superman?
Assistant: [Stumped silence.]

Thomas Street
Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: Pants

Finance clerk: Every time she comes in here, he grabs it and pulls it out, and she runs away.

Vienna, Virginia

Overheard by: Receptionitis

Lowly finance clerk to director: What'd you lose?
Director: The eyeball from my carrot.


Overheard by: Finance Officer #3

Power broker #1: Two large cappuccinos.
Cashier: Thank you. That will be $4.50.
Power broker #1: Where’s the cinnamon?
Cashier: I’m sorry, we’re out of cinnamon.
Power broker #1: Then I don’t want it!
Cashier: Excuse me?
Power broker #2: Okay, let’s just bring it back to the office.
Power broker #1: No! Just give me my money back. I can’t drink the foamy milk without the cinnamon.

100 Broadway
New York, New York

Overheard by: Mark