Financial analyst: This might be a bad analogy, but it's like this: if there's a guy up on the roof of a house and he's throwing babies off, and you just barely catch the first couple of babies, it might mean that's not a very good strategy and what you really need to do is get someone to go up on the roof and get the guy down.
Coworker: You ever notice how whenever you start a sentence that way, a hush falls over the area?
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: MPW
Male bank president: My daughter’s gonna letter in high school track this year.
Female vice president: Oh?
Male bank president: Yeah, she’s a runner. All year I’ve been taking her out on country roads to let her spread her legs.
Female vice president, under her breath: Putz!
1105 Vargas Street
Atwood, Kansas
Accounting girl, walking into the lunchroom: Hey, it smells really good in here!
Project manager: Yeah that's cause I farted.
Calgary
Canadia
Loan officer: Things are uncertain in America. They want to cash out on their equity because things are turmoilous.
Marlborough, Massachusetts
VP: Hey, can you pop in here to chat yet?
Accounting asst: Give me just a sec…
VP: How about now? It's urgent, and I've been giving you secs all morning.
Passing by office manager: So much for last week's sexual harassment training…
Washington, DC
Overheard by: I could use some…
Account manager: That's like the pot calling the kettle black. Wait a minute… Is that racist?
Assistant: Wanna know what is racist? Cotton picking!
Winnipeg
Manitoba
Canadia
Overheard by: Chelsea
IT guy, hurrying through lobby: There's someone downstairs that can't figure out how to use the little box.
Jaded marketing gal: God, I hate that.
Seattle, Washington
Auditor: What is a ‘Dutch Auction Tender Offer’? Is that where they go to Dutch and have an auction? … Where is Dutch?
Parham Road
Richmond, Virginia
Accounts manager (shouting): This is our biggest sales event of the year! This is going to be bigger than ever! Big! Big! Big!
Accounts clerk: Does that mean I should get an extra roll of nickels at the bank?
Pearl, Mississippi
Overheard by: Brain Dancing
CFO, looking for chocolate: It looks like a goddess with flaming hair or an upside-down horse.
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Natalie
