Partner: I’m gonna call her and see if I can feel her up.
1001 G Street NW
Washington, DC
Partner: I’m gonna call her and see if I can feel her up.
1001 G Street NW
Washington, DC
Co-worker #1: So how’s your belly button?
Co-worker #2: Um…it’s okay.
Co-worker #1: You know my dad’s scar looks like he has 3 belly buttons.
Co-worker #2: Oh yeah? Well, my friend’s isn’t even in the right place. It’s like way down here.
Intern #1: So it’s like she has a extra vag?
Intern #2: This is like the weirdest thing I’ve heard at work.
600 Water Street SW
Washington, DC
Overheard by: ADS
Co-worker: You need to teach me Spanish and I need to teach you everything.
1341 G Street NW
Washington, DC
Assistant: Yeah, we need one of those industrial-sized–
Director: Oh, I know, you can shred a baby in one of those things!
1050 Thomas Jefferson Street NW
Washington, DC
Attorney: We’re smarter for making the correct decision to the everyday question: drink or work? Correct answer: drink and work.
717 Madison Place NW
Washington, DC
PR: [Linda], it’s me. Could you buzz me when the news crew gets here…[Linda]?
Receptionist on speaker: Well…uh…[Eric] asked me to buzz him when they got here.
PR: Um, okay?
Receptionist on speaker: [Eric Dixon].
PR: I know who [Eric] is.
Receptionist on speaker: See, yeah, the thing is that [Eric], [Eric Dixon], uh, just called and asked me to buzz him when the news crew gets here.
PR: Yes.
Receptionist on speaker: So, what? Do you think…it would be better if I buzzed you instead? Because [Eric Dixon] asked me…
PR: Do you think you could just buzz both of us?
Receptionist on speaker: Oh. Yeah, I guess I could do that.
1875 Connecticut Avenue NW
Washington, DC
Overheard by: frau
Chair: The beauty of this meeting is that we don’t need to make any decisions.
2000 Navy Pentagon
Washington, DC
Worker #1: Congratulations on your engagement and your new job! When is your last day?
Worker #2: Next Wednesday, thanks.
Worker #3: Are you leaving so soon because of that pooper ring on your finger?
Worker #2: “Pooper ring”?
Worker #3: Yes, you know…You had to take it in the pooper to get a ring that big.
1600 21st Street NW
Washington, DC
Worker: The vendor wants to come in to finalize the program we discussed last month. Can you meet with him next week?
Boss: No, I am booked all week. Wasn't he supposed to send some follow up information?
Worker: I don't know, I was eating lunch.
Washington, DC
Male grunt: If my mouse stops working, I’m going to go home.
Female grunt: Well, did you try jiggling it?
Male grunt: Yeah, I jiggled the shit out of it. [Female grunt giggles.]
Foggy Bottom
Washington, DC
