Bank teller: I was working drive-through this morning and offered a customer a bone for her dog in the back seat.
Associate: I think it’s nice that we do that.
Bank teller: The customer said it wasn’t a dog, it was her mother.
801 West Big Beaver Road
Troy, Michigan
Coworker on phone to business contact: So, are you talking about fecal year 2008 or 2009?
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: analyst
Bean Counter #1: Opening the shades really changed the colors in the
room.
Bean Counter #2: Yeah, the walls are now a different color puke.
4 High Ridge Park
Stamford, Connecticut
Account biller #1: Let me ask you something, what am I supposed to do with those claims the boss just gave me?
Account biller #2: Your job, perhaps?
Memphis, Tennessee
Overheard by: Cala
Customer: Why is your store so big?
Salesgirl: [Silence.]Customer: I’m an accountant — I notice these things.
Chocolate store
North Plainfield, New Jersey
Overheard by: Other Salesgirl
Banker #1: How do you file an old CD referral?
Banker #2: Well you submit it and cancel it and submit it and cancel it and repeat that 5 times, and then wash your hands…Oh, I thought you said OCD referral. Like obsessive-compul–
Banker #1: I get it.
1241 South Wabash Avenue
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Teddy
Accountant: This chicken [Sue] brought in is yummy. I’m just going to take a break to eat it here rather than take it back to my desk. I don’t trust myself not to get my paperwork all greasy.
Supervisor: That’s why I’m going to make a sandwich out of it.
Secretary: Oh, I don’t care about greasy fingers. All I do is handle incoming checks all day.
401 Church Street
Nashville, Tennessee
Loud finance lady on the phone: Oh, so you're a bear? I never would have guessed.
Stratford, Connecticut
Auditor: I am a man! I have chest hair!
46th St & 3rd Ave
New York City, New York
Overheard by: Auditor #2
Account manager: This report is missing data. Why aren't February 1st and 2nd included?
Analyst: Because I asked you yesterday if you wanted me to include them, and you told me not to.
Account manager (surprised): Oh. I did? Oh. Okay. It's great, then. Thanks.
New York City, New York
