Suit on cell: So, my division is like an aborigine, and their division is like a rhinoceros.
Palo Alto, California
Overheard by: Spittake
Suit on cell: So, my division is like an aborigine, and their division is like a rhinoceros.
Palo Alto, California
Overheard by: Spittake
Product manager: So, it’s a win-win situation, but without the wins.
70 East 55th Street
New York, New York
Admin assistant: I hear that Jay-Z and Beyoncé actually have an open relationship.
India-Indian boss: Well, it is no surprise since she does not want to get married.
Admin assistant: I guess you’re right.
India-Indian boss: I mean, why buy the milk when that cow is just outside?
685 3rd Avenue
New York, New York
Database admin #1: Well, this is a good place to work. You can really learn a lot here…
Database admin #2: Unlike a shop where everything’s automated and running smoothly — a place like that, something goes down, you just execute a stored procedure and you don’t have to know what it does.
Database admin #1: Yeah, you don’t want to work in a place where everything’s well-managed and actually works.
Database admin #2: Yeah! You won’t learn anything that way!
80 Carillon Parkway
St. Petersburg, Florida
Overheard by: The Nerd Whisperer
Boss: When, in the course of your life, you are traveling to the right you will find that you must take the toll road and pay your dues. There is no free road to the right.
Employee: Uh… Can I have my doughnut now?
Bountiful, Utah
Overheard by: tkt
Board member: There has got to be a way out of this place.
175 S. 3d St
Columbus, Ohio
Branch manager: Wiggy wiggy wiggy wuzza wuzza wiggy. Wiggy!
8220 England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
CIO: You developers have to tell the BAs if you’re going to miss a deadline, or they’ll be in the dark. Then they can’t tell the managers, and they’ll be in the dark. Pretty soon we have this big snowball of darkness.
625 Marquette Avenue
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Employee #1: Dave*, you’re what, 27? You’re too young to get married. You need to wait until you’re 35 and then marry a 23 year old. Birthing is just “bam! bam! bam!”– brutal on them. So you need to marry young.
Employee #2: So I need to work here for 8 years and marry a girl who is just graduating from here?
Employee #3: Start looking, man. She’s in high school now.
Employee #2: She’d be what, 15? Hey, Jim*, how old are your daughters?
Employee #1: 13 and 15…Shut up!
3800 Victory Parkway
Cincinnati, Ohio
Five maintenance engineers stand staring at a window with rain pouring down on the inside of the glass.
Engineer: If we all knew about this, why didn’t we fix it?
6th and Sycamore
Cincinnati, Ohio
Overheard by: Alice
