Engineers

Female architect to male engineer: I don't care about the size of your beam, it's not going to fit in this space I have!

Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Office temp

Engineer #1: So, Tom*, I'm going to need you to get me up to date on all of these projects before you leave.
Engineer #2: Yes, I think a Vulcan mind meld is the best option.

Hill Field, Utah

Overheard by: Snickering Intern

Engineer: Nasty letters always work!

315 Park Avenue South
New York, New York

Overheard by: Priscilla Perez

Office engineer #1: Why are you washing your hands in the water cooler?
Office engineer #2: Oh, I was playing with my dirty, failed parts.

Oil pump company
Claremore, Oklahoma

Overheard by: Tony

Guy engineer #1: Hey, want a muffin?
Guy engineer #2: Dude, you’re my muffin.
Guy engineer #1, in small voice: I feel uncomfortable now.

E. County Road
Wellington, Colorado

Engineer to operations guy: You're all evil in this department. (points at administrative assistant) Especially you, you're the leader.
Administrative assistant: What?

Manhattan, New York

Engineer #1: July 21st–is that the equinox or the solstice? I always get the two mixed up.
Engineer #2 (home-schooled): I dunno… I don't know anything about that satanic stuff.

Mississippi

VP Engineering: Printing has been dropped as a feature, but at least we’re not sacrificing quality to meet the schedule.

2279 Vista Del Mar
San Mateo, California

Engineer #1: What is taking her so long?
Engineer #2: We're starving in here!
Engineer #1: Ya! Hasn't she ever heard of the Donner Party?!

Utah

Older janitor to young engineer, about picking up girls: You have to trap'em like Daniel Boone style, set out some salad with ranch dressin' or somethin' like that”.

Lexington, Kentucky

Overheard by: Rick