Hardhat #1 yelling to buddy in crane: How’d you get to be so tall?
Hardhat #2: Insanity.
Hardhat #1: Shamu?
Hardhat #2: No — insanity.
Hardhat #1: I can’t hear anything down here.

University of Arkansas
Fayetteville, Arkansas

Manager to clumsy coworker: You’re about as graceful as a seven-legged octopus with a muscle spasm!

Fast food joint
Fayetteville, Arkansas

Overheard by: Dubird

Office guy, complaining about his recent camping trip: Bears may do that in the woods, but Alex* does not.

Springdale, Arkansas

Loud cubicle neighbor: And that's why both my ex-husbands are dead!

Fayetteville, Arkansas

Maintenance idiot: How do you think they came up with that whole groundhog thing?
Electronics clerk: What groundhog thing?
Maintenance idiot: You know, the groundhog sees his shadow and we have six more months of winter. How do you think they came up with that idea?
Electronics clerk: Ummmm… It’s six weeks…
Maintenance idiot: I bet it was all of those animal activist settlers back when they came to America, or something.
Electronics clerk: Animal activist settlers?

Ft. Smith, Arkansas

Overheard by: i love my job

Cubicle dweller on phone: Nah, she's not been banging me very much. I think I'm banging her more than she's banging me.

Conway, Arkansas

Engineer: I’m against Google Earth! The terrorists are using it! And the communists!

700 West Capitol Avenue
Little Rock, Arkansas

Female coworker, raiding candy bowl on guys desk: How do you stay away from this candy all day?
Male coworker: I thought you were a nut girl.
Female coworker: I am, but sometimes I need my hard sweets.

Little Rock, Arkansas

Lady peon: You can fit a lot tampons in there, but pads are a completely different story.

Fayetteville, Arkansas

Overheard by: So What?

Owner: Have you proposed to her yet? When are you gonna propose to that girl? You're not getting a bonus, a raise, or a review until you get down on your knees.
Employee: (smirks)
Owner: For her!

Rogers, Arkansas