4PM Update Timesheets

HR: You miscoded your timesheets as vacation instead of holiday.
Employee: What difference does it make? It’s a day off. Can’t you just fix it?
HR: The difference is that it put you over on your vacation time for the year.
Employee: But it was a holiday. Can’t you just fix it?
HR: Do you know how many days off you have per year?
Employee: Yes, but holiday/vacation, it’s all a day off.
HR: Tell that to the employee that just got let go for miscoding time.
Employee: …I’ll fix it.

4400 Post Oak Parkway
Houston, Texas

Posted on December 11, 2023
Coworkers, Holidays, Office Politics, Texas, Vacation

4PM Tinsel Everything

Worker #1: Must be nice to have so much time to put up all these friggin christmas decorations.
Worker #2: You have time. You just never decorate.
Worker #1: That’s right, everyone knows not to touch my area. I’d be pissed if they did.
Worker #2: Hmm…wait till tomorrow, I think I’ll piss you off with some holiday cheer.
Worker #1: Go ahead, I’ll just take it down. What a waste My husband does that crap at home too!

3949 Jefferson Road
Ashtabula, Ohio

Posted on October 11, 2023
Coworkers, Gripes, Holidays, Ohio

5PM Luckily We Do…for Four Days!

Customer: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Vietnam?
Employee: Um…no?

2063 Camden Avenue
San Jose, California

Posted on September 18, 2023
California, Dumb Customers, Employees, General Idiocy, Geography & History, Holidays

You're Fired.

Colleague on phone: I want to got to Mexico in May, but I don't want to miss Cinco de Mayo.

Boston, Massachusetts

Posted on April 28, 2023
Coworkers, Holidays, Massachusetts, On the phone, Travel, Wishes

3PM Hand Out Secret Santa

Co-worker #1: Hey, [Eric]. I know what I’ll get you for Christmas.
[Eric]: Oh yeah? What?
Co-worker #1: Some wifebeaters to wear with white shirts so I don’t have to see your boobs through the shirt anymore.
Co-worker #2: All right…I’ve heard enough about [Eric]’s manboobs.

839 Marshall Phelps Road
Windsor, Connecticut

Posted on March 20, 2023
Connecticut, Coworkers, Gripes, Holidays, Physical Appearance, Violence

When to Call the Police beforehand, Just in Case

Suit: I want to take a personal day on Friday.
Boss: Okay, no problem. What are you doing on your day off?
Suit: I’m not telling you — it’s a personal day!

2nd Street
Jersey City, New Jersey

Overheard by: Hobo Whisperer

Posted on March 7, 2023
Bosses and Underlings, Holidays, New Jersey, Time Management

3PM James’ Birthday Thing

Birthday: Thanks.
Office: Speech!
Birthday: I want you all to know that this is the oldest I’ve ever been.

150 River Street
Hackensack, New Jersey

Posted on February 5, 2023
Coworkers, General Idiocy, Holidays, New Jersey

I See Your Attempt at Humor, and I Refuse to Acknowledge It

Deskie #1: What’s that smell? Sulfur? Rotten eggs?
Deskie #2: I have it figured out: It’s Halloween, and all these girls are walking around with nothing covering areas which haven’t been exposed in public since last Halloween.
Deskie #1: I don’t get why that is relevant.

Front desk, Central Michigan University
Mount Pleasant, Michigan

Overheard by: Not A Deskie

Posted on August 30, 2022
Body Parts, Coworkers, Education, General Idiocy, Holidays, Insults, Michigan, Sensory Experiences

As Long as It's Not the Same Date as Halloween Again

Office lady #1: What day is Thanksgiving on this year?
Office lady #2: I don't know… Thursday or Friday?

Springfield, Missouri

Overheard by: Jennifer Gerboth

Posted on June 27, 2022
Dumb Employees, Holidays, Missouri, Questions, Time Management

5PM That’s a Wrap

Employee: Hey! Doesn’t your ma get you anything from the Easter bunny?
Supervisor: It’s been years since I’ve gotten anything.
Employee’s boy: You live with your mom?
Supervisor: So what? So do you!
Employee’s boy: No, I don’t.
Supervisor: Huh?…Oh…Ah, shit.

6101 Wetzel Avenue
Fort Carson, Colorado

Posted on March 22, 2022
Bosses, Colorado, Employees, Family, General Idiocy, Holidays, Kids

Holidays