Holidays

1PM Vacation Memo

Boss: Did I forget to tell you that we will be open this Monday? I decided not to close the office after all.

Employee: For what?

Boss: It’s Labor Day, and I was going to close the office, but decided not to.

Employee: It’s not Labor Day! Memorial Day is this month, but not until the end of the month.

Boss: It says right here on my calendar it’s Labor Day. I thought it was weird that Labor and Memorial Day were in the same month.

Employee: Let me see that calendar. . . Oh, for God’s sakes, do you see that M by the date?

Boss: Ummm, yeah.

Employee: That means Labor Day for Mexico!

Boss: No kidding! Wow, I feel really stupid!

Employee: Yeah, you should! Happy Labor Day, Senorita!

4302 West Crystal Lake Road
McHenry, Illinois

Overheard by: Gramma

5PM Here Comes a Long Weekend!

Co-worker #1: Hey, we get off for February 20th, too.
Co-worker #2: Oh, for President’s Day? Wait, when is Independence Day? That’s in the summer, right?
Co-worker #1: Uh, yeah, that’s July 4th.

175 5th Avenue
New York, NY

Overheard by: Peter H

4PM Update Timesheets

HR: You miscoded your timesheets as vacation instead of holiday.
Employee: What difference does it make? It’s a day off. Can’t you just fix it?
HR: The difference is that it put you over on your vacation time for the year.
Employee: But it was a holiday. Can’t you just fix it?
HR: Do you know how many days off you have per year?
Employee: Yes, but holiday/vacation, it’s all a day off.
HR: Tell that to the employee that just got let go for miscoding time.
Employee: …I’ll fix it.

4400 Post Oak Parkway
Houston, Texas

4PM Tinsel Everything

Worker #1: Must be nice to have so much time to put up all these friggin christmas decorations.
Worker #2: You have time. You just never decorate.
Worker #1: That’s right, everyone knows not to touch my area. I’d be pissed if they did.
Worker #2: Hmm…wait till tomorrow, I think I’ll piss you off with some holiday cheer.
Worker #1: Go ahead, I’ll just take it down. What a waste My husband does that crap at home too!

3949 Jefferson Road
Ashtabula, Ohio

5PM Luckily We Do…for Four Days!

Customer: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Vietnam?
Employee: Um…no?

2063 Camden Avenue
San Jose, California

You're Fired.

Colleague on phone: I want to got to Mexico in May, but I don't want to miss Cinco de Mayo.

Boston, Massachusetts

3PM Hand Out Secret Santa

Co-worker #1: Hey, [Eric]. I know what I’ll get you for Christmas.
[Eric]: Oh yeah? What?
Co-worker #1: Some wifebeaters to wear with white shirts so I don’t have to see your boobs through the shirt anymore.
Co-worker #2: All right…I’ve heard enough about [Eric]’s manboobs.

839 Marshall Phelps Road
Windsor, Connecticut

When to Call the Police beforehand, Just in Case

Suit: I want to take a personal day on Friday.
Boss: Okay, no problem. What are you doing on your day off?
Suit: I’m not telling you — it’s a personal day!

2nd Street
Jersey City, New Jersey

Overheard by: Hobo Whisperer

3PM James’ Birthday Thing

Birthday: Thanks.
Office: Speech!
Birthday: I want you all to know that this is the oldest I’ve ever been.

150 River Street
Hackensack, New Jersey

I See Your Attempt at Humor, and I Refuse to Acknowledge It

Deskie #1: What’s that smell? Sulfur? Rotten eggs?
Deskie #2: I have it figured out: It’s Halloween, and all these girls are walking around with nothing covering areas which haven’t been exposed in public since last Halloween.
Deskie #1: I don’t get why that is relevant.

Front desk, Central Michigan University
Mount Pleasant, Michigan

Overheard by: Not A Deskie

© 2025 OverheardinTheOffice.com
Hat Tip 🎩 to The Marketing Scientist