Australia

Receptionist: Argh! My arm is so itchy. I’m, like, allergic to work!
Co-worker: Stop scratching; you are making it worse! At lunch, go
and get an antihistamine to stop the swelling.
Receptionist: Antihistamine or antiinflammatory? I think it’s
inflamed. What’s the difference anyway?
Co-worker: Antihistamine is something that is not histamine, and
antiinflammatory is something that’s not inflammatory.
Receptionist: So I’ll ask the chemist?

25 Parramatta Road
Underwood, Queensland
Australia

Editor #1: Did you check these names religiously?
Editor #2: Yeah, he’s praying they’re all right.

2 Holt Steet
Surry Hills, New South Wales
Australia

A co-worker steps out of the elevator into the reception lobby.

Co-worker #1: Ew, it smells like a nursing home in here.

5 minutes pass.

Co-worker #2: Mmm, it smells good in here.

55 Southbank Boulevard
Melbourne, Victoria
Australia

Overheard by: Emily Hopkins

Male office drone: Aaahhhh! The female urinal!

Perth
Australia

Boss: Oh you fucking idiot!
Pause
Boss: Why don’t you just go home, you wanker!
Boss walks out of the office.
Employee: Who are you yelling at?
Boss: Me, I’m going home!

301 Pirie Street
Adelaide, Australia

Overheard by: Jessica

Manager: It is important that you put any call through to me today — my mother-in-law is dying.
Receptionist: Is she okay?
Manager: No, she’s dying.

Davey Street
Hobart
Australia

Coworker: Would you like some tomato sauce with that muffin?
Customer: (blank look)
Coworker: Ah, shit.

Sydney
Australia

Overheard by: Alaska

Manager: So Mike* is leaving.
Office peon #1: Will anyone notice? What does he do, anyway?
Office peon #2: He's a fluffer.
Office peon #1: What?!
Office peon #2: What? He, y'know, fluffs out his job so it looks like he's doing more than he is.
Manager to office peon #1: After the meeting, you explain.

Brisbane
Australia

Overheard by: EarleyDaysYet

Head chef: You know what a cabbage is!
Other chef: (blank look)

Restaurant
Regional Queensland
Australia

Magazine writer #1: So, it turned out the chick I took home from the party was a gymnast!
Staff members: Wow… That’s hot… Lucky git…
Magazine writer #2: Why, what’s so great about gymnasts?
Magazine writer #1: Um… Well, they’re really flexible…
Magazine writer #2: Oh, well, you should see the guy gymnasts, then!
Staff members: [Silence.]

35-51 Mitchell Street
Sydney
Australia

Overheard by: and he’s OUT!