Cute gay guy: Tome Cruise and Katie Holmes were looking for an apartment on my street.
Female coworker: Oh, really?
Cute gay guy: Yeah, I live on Toorak Road. If they move there, I wanna steal Suri. And have crazy bum sex on my balcony! (demonstrates by thrusting in the air) Take that, Scientology!
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: Giggling
Secretary: So, what's her husband like?
Manager: Oh, he's kind of like Mr Bean…you think he may be slightly autistic but he's still really sexually attractive.
Secretary: Uhh…
Office
Sydney
Australia
Girl #1: It’s so scary hearing about people dying.
Girl #2: Yeah, totally… You can die from so many things. You can die from death, sickness…
Sydney, Australia
Overheard by: elle
Office drone #1: What’s a funnier prank — if I tape the the receiver to the boss’s phone, or if I fix it so she can’t open the drawer?
Office drone #2: Um, maybe you should… [looks pointedly at returning boss behind drone #1].
Office drone #1: I know! I’ll glue her coffee mug to her desk. Bitch’ll be spewing!
Boss, standing right behind drone #1: Bitch is behind you.
Harris Street
Pyrmont, Sydney
Australia
Overheard by: get back to work!
Charity worker: His name was Brandon*, and he was about six and he has Down Syndrome and eye cancer, so he has one glass eye, but you can’t tell. But sometimes it plops out. He also needs a major hip replacement, but he does walk most of the time. He can’t talk. He’s sooo cute.
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: Bora
Receptionist, yelling: I want to show everyone my box!
Melbourne
Australia
Sales manager: Oh, no… I’m not laughing at orphans, I’m laughing at old demented people.
Eagle Street, Brisbane
Australia
Overheard by: Clerk Peon
Coworker: It's like looking at livestock. Bull walks by? Oh, it's a bull. Cow walks by? Oh, it's a cow. Lady Gaga walks by? Oh, it's Lady Gaga without her pants again!
Australia
Male staff member: Yeah, but knowing my luck, it'll happen again when I'm not here!
Female staff member: It's okay. You're married now. You'll get lucky one day!
Blockbuster
Australia
Boss: What are you going to do on your lunch break?
Assistant: I think I might go outside and spread my legs.
Boss: Pardon?
Assistant: I said I think I might go outside and stretch my legs. (walks off very quickly)
North Ryde
Australia
Overheard by: Sinead
