Sales engineer: Hey, you can’t use that, that’s a sales punch!
Accountant: Care to see a finance punch?
59 Marsh Lane
Solihull, West Midlands
UK
Sales engineer: Hey, you can’t use that, that’s a sales punch!
Accountant: Care to see a finance punch?
59 Marsh Lane
Solihull, West Midlands
UK
Co-worker #1: I’m really tired this morning.
Co-worker #2: Why don’t you try Red Bull?
Co-worker #1: That stuff doesn’t work for me.
Co-worker #2: Well, have you ever tried it without the vodka?
2783 Lancashire Road
Cleveland Heights, Ohio
Owner: You’ve got to tell me these things. I don’t know everything that’s going on…you’d be surprised at what I don’t know.
2100 Goshen Road
Fort Wayne, Indiana
Office monkey #1: Bro, this job is like motherfucking cocaine!
Office monkey #2: How’s that?
Office monkey #1: It seems fun at first but then it fucks your asshole raw.
1211 6th Avenue
New York, NY
Manager #1: I don’t feel like working today.
Manager #2: So why don’t you go home?
Manager #1: ‘Cause I don’t get paid to do nothing at home….
3200 S. Las Vegas Boulevard
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: Cathie
Co-worker #1: God! I hate it when those two have to work together! It’s so painful. It’s like watching a monkey and a dolphin try to build a house.
Co-worker #2: I think you underestimate the communication skills of wildlife.
150 Broadway
New York, NY
Guy: Why the hell is my computer running so slow?…Ah! here it is: “System Idle Process” is taking up 98% of my CPU…fucking Microsoft…
1701 North Street
Endicott, New York
New hire: Lord, I am not drinking any of this company’s water. There are entirely too many pregnant people here.
9106 E. Panorama Circle
Englewood, Colorado
Overheard by: Homer Thompson
Building service: Coffee’s shit, man.
White collar: Yeah. Gotta work, though.
The building service person snorts an imaginary line from the countertop.
Building service: Dat’s da shit you need, man. Coke id up.
1114 Avenue of the Americas
New York, NY
Angry suit: It’s like I need to come to every meeting if I want to know what’s actually going on!
Boylston Street
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: At EVERY Meeting
