Secretary to another: So I had a dream that you and I murdered Ryan, and all I could think was I was upset because I just friended him on Facebook.
Allentown, Pennsylvania
Secretary to another: So I had a dream that you and I murdered Ryan, and all I could think was I was upset because I just friended him on Facebook.
Allentown, Pennsylvania
Boss: I like your pompoms.
Secretary: Thanks, I got them for my birthday.
Oregon
Overheard by: killerwhales
General manager: If there's a problem report immediately, don't wait for an opportune moment.
Teenage intern: Is that a real word?
General manager: What? “Opportune”?
Teenage intern: No, “moment.”
Derry, New Hampshire
Client: I think we'll need to push this to Q4 or Q5.
Seattle, Washington
Sales rep, about clients coming in later: Just so you know, one of them is deaf.
Secretary: Oh. Should we have printed some of the reports in braille?
Austin, Texas
Office drone, after extremely serious meeting: We should all go on a picnic!
Downtown Los Angeles, California
Secretary to intern: How does your cat like tuna? I mean, he's never been to the ocean before.
Houston, Texas
Overheard by: I hate my desk
Coworker to new employee: Love the Avril Lavigne poster, Susan*. I had no idea you were such a fan!
New employee: Never missed a concert in the Midwest! Avril really speaks to me. Her songs are so profound.
Arrogant man in cube across: Oh, come on Susan! As a 40-something woman with bad style and three kids, what could a 18-year-old possibly teach you that is so profound? If you started wearing heavy black eyeliner and fishnets, then maybe I would believe you.
Edina, Minnesota
Trainer: Doing a job correctly is usually better than doing it wrong.
Trainee: Are you fucking serious, bro?
Gunter Air Force Base
Montgomery, Alabama
Overheard by: At least someone realizes it too
Coworker #1: Are you posting time in the system?
Coworker #2: No.
Coworker #1: Well, I can't enter my time, it won't let me put any numbers in.
(coworker #2 walks over, looks at situation, presses num lock, walks away)
North Sydney
Australia
Overheard by: Renee
