Coworker to new employee: Love the Avril Lavigne poster, Susan*. I had no idea you were such a fan!
New employee: Never missed a concert in the Midwest! Avril really speaks to me. Her songs are so profound.
Arrogant man in cube across: Oh, come on Susan! As a 40-something woman with bad style and three kids, what could a 18-year-old possibly teach you that is so profound? If you started wearing heavy black eyeliner and fishnets, then maybe I would believe you.
Edina, Minnesota
Trainer: Doing a job correctly is usually better than doing it wrong.
Trainee: Are you fucking serious, bro?
Gunter Air Force Base
Montgomery, Alabama
Overheard by: At least someone realizes it too
Coworker #1: Are you posting time in the system?
Coworker #2: No.
Coworker #1: Well, I can't enter my time, it won't let me put any numbers in.
(coworker #2 walks over, looks at situation, presses num lock, walks away)
North Sydney
Australia
Overheard by: Renee
Colleague, on phone to is help desk: Hi, I'd like to report that we haven't had access to the internet for two days now.
Help desk: Okay, we'll log it as an issue.
Colleague: What happens now?
Help desk: We'll report it to security to look at.
Colleague: And what will they do?
Help desk: They'll look at it.
Manchester, New Hampshire
50-year-old female #1: Oh my god! You have to hear this! (reads entire e-mail aloud)
40 year-old female #2: Oh my god!
50-year-old female #1: I know!
40 year-old female #2: Oh my god!
50-year-old female #1: I'm forwarding it to you now.
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: NoRest4TheWicked
White female applicant taking computer test: Wait. My screen just went all Stevie Wonder.
Manager: Stevie Wonder?
Female applicant: You know… All black.
Scottsdale, Arizona
Overheard by: Seriously?
Female client: I'll have to go over this with my partner.
Clued-out accountant: Oh. I didn't know you were a lesbian.
Female client: My business partner.
Toronto
Canadia
Office manager: So, what's beeping down here?
Maintenance guy: Well, we think it's the fire alarm. But we're not sure…
Nashville, Tennessee
Overheard by: cubegirl
Worker bee #1: If only the sheets weren't green…
Counselor: Maybe blue sheets?
Worker bee #2: What's wrong with green? They've been green sheets for years! You could leave tomorrow and we'd be stuck with pink sheets!
Worker bee #1: No, I don't like pink, they wouldn't be pink. Also, where am I going?
Worker bee #2: I don't know!
(pause)
Worker bee #1: Maybe something sassy…
Counselor: Well, I'm feeling lightheaded now.
Greensboro, North Carolina
Overheard by: student worker
Older woman to employee: Italy is a country in Rome, right?
Barnes & Noble
Long Island, New York
Overheard by: kristen
