Coworker, during meeting: For instance, if Bob had a dentist appointment, we would need someone to cover the phones that day.
Boss: Are you kidding? Bob doesn't go to the dentist, have you smelled his breath?
Los Angeles, California
Coworker, during meeting: For instance, if Bob had a dentist appointment, we would need someone to cover the phones that day.
Boss: Are you kidding? Bob doesn't go to the dentist, have you smelled his breath?
Los Angeles, California
Male: No, I'm sure it said “buffalo mozzarella.”
Female #1: Well, I know mozzarella is made from cow's milk.
Male: Maybe it's from Buffalo, NY.
Female #1: Is that where mozzarella is from?
Male: Maybe.
Female #2: Is goat cheese made from goats?
Waitress: No, usually from the milk.
Seattle, Washington
Office lady: I am not having a good humpday. Stupid humpday!
Malvern, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: NotAtWork?
Mail teller: You’ll need to call 1-800-USPS. Wait. That doesn’t sound right. It must be 1-800-USPS though.
Customer: Okay. Thanks!
Post Office
Rochester, New York
Overheard by: How many digits in a phone number?
Meeting speaker: Either get on the train or get off the boat.
Washington, DC
Office guy to mother of five: There's five of you. That means you have five extra kidneys. You can get good money for those!
Massachusetts
Overheard by: Friday
Office lady: That woman's smoking crack. She's smoking crack and watching Elvis Blue Hawaii videos.
Boston, Massachusetts
Cubicle #1: Oh no, today is Tuesday the 13th! Does that mean anything?
Cubicle #2: Umm… Today is the 12th. Tomorrow is the 13th. And humpday!
Cubicle #1: Oh no! Wednesday the 13th! Does that mean anything?
Cubicle #2: Well, it’s the day before Valentine’s Day. You got your wife something already, right?
Cubicle #1: Dang! I better think of something quick, right?
Cubicle #2: You haven’t gotten a card or anything?
Cubicle #1: Well, I did actually get her a gift. But I opened up my trunk yesterday and it smelled funny so I took it back.
Cubicle #2: … It wasn’t a puppy, was it?
England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
EVP at copier, yawning: Ohhhhh… Monkey. (walks away)
Marlborough, Massachusetts
