Office worker on speakerphone: Hello.
Creepy customer: I was just sitting here eating some creamed corn and thinking about you so I thought that I would give you a call.
Office worker: Please hold and I will transfer you to my supervisor.
1st Avenue
Birmingham, Alabama
65-something delivery man to 30-something female receptionist, as she bends over to lift printer:
Oh, wait, let me do that. I don't want you to hurt your ovaries.
Denver, Colorado
Guy in next cube: In my opinion, a chimney is no place to raise a family.
Pennsylvania
Overheard by: ReRo
Employee accompanied by small child: I smashed it on the ground and then I hit it with a chair, and now it feels like it's on fire. It's not, but it feels that way.
Small child: (inaudible)
Employee: No, I don't think any blood's coming out.
Redmond, Washington
Cube dweller on phone: Hahaha… yeah, I can just imagine them literally chasing you around, and smearing you with that stuff!
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: I don't want to get smeared
Cubicle rat on phone: I expect a white man to lie to me, not a black guy.
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Greg
Agent, about client: She is just as nice as pie! I swear, she should get pregnant more often.
Boston, Massachusetts
Publicist: It was amazing. Stevie could do everything. He could leave his apartment, go to the elevator, everything.
Proofer: Wow. He didn’t even need a cane?
Publicist: Of course not; he’s not that old.
1438 North Gower Street
Los Angeles, California
Accounting: You submitted a payment request for a renewal fee.
Peon: Yes.
Accounting: Can you find out how long the renewal term is for?
Peon: It says “annual renewal fee” on the invoice.
Accounting: Yeah, I saw that, but do you know when it’s valid until?
Peon: It says valid from October 31, 2005 on the invoice.
Accounting: Yeah, but can you make sure? You never know it could be for like two years or something.
3700 Wilshire Boulevard
Los Angeles, California
Frazzled accountant: So yes, please mail me the statement ASAP! Yes, thanks, thanks. Okay, love you.
(after a minute, to peon)
Did I just say “I love you”?
California
