Sales guy: Jason*, quit calling into my sales territory! You are a freaking poacher!
Jason: Poacher? I don’t even like eggs.
Sales guy: You’re an idiot.
6400 Congress Avenue
Boca Raton, Florida
Overheard by: Fried Egg
Sales guy: Jason*, quit calling into my sales territory! You are a freaking poacher!
Jason: Poacher? I don’t even like eggs.
Sales guy: You’re an idiot.
6400 Congress Avenue
Boca Raton, Florida
Overheard by: Fried Egg
Coworker, testing e-mails: I got a funky one in my junk!
Corporate Park Drive
Herndon, Virginia
Adviser: Okay, is everyone here? Great. So, John*, why don't you tell us what you've worked on this week?
John: Well, I did…
Adviser, interrupting: Actually, John, I'm just going to hummer you for a minute while I show them the data.
Female grad student: Um, what?
Adviser: I'm going to hummer him and just show everyone this, you know, like run over him like a big fucking car.
Female grad student: Uh, okay, but you can't say that.
Adviser: What? Why?
Female grad student: I'll tell you after lab meeting.
Adviser, angrily: What is so bad about saying that? Is it like mean or something to “hummer” someone?
Female grad student: Well it's not mean, it's just… Yeah, don't say that. Ever. We'll talk later.
Johns Hopkins University
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: LabCat
Tech #1: I have to stop using the f-word!
Tech #2: You need something else to say. Like…”butt breath.”
Tech #1: That's nasty.
Tech #3: Not if it's a baby's butt.
St. Charles, Missouri
Co-worker #1: Are we loud in meetings?
Co-worker #2: Some of us are.
Co-worker #1: Let me correct that: are we allowed in meetings?
3650 131st Avenue SE
Bellevue, Washington
Lady in queue to group of young people: When I was at school I was referred to as being a bit odd. But I didn't mind being different, I enjoyed science subjects like biology. Learning about orgasms and bacteria. Wait! Did I just say what I think I said?
London
England
Overheard by: Misslead youth
Nurse #1: Do you want me to go through your legs?
Nurse #2: I can’t believe you don’t want to go through my legs to find the lower hole.
Nurse #1: Well, pull out the first one so I can see!
Nurse #2: Is it in?
Nurse #1: I don’t know, I can’t feel anything!
Nurse #2: I’m gonna pee my pants! I can’t believe there’s no one here to see this!
2990 Mack Road
Fairfield, Ohio
Overheard by: Kimmie
Model #1: You've got goosebumps, baby!
Model #2: Is the door propped open? It's fucking freezing in here!
Model #3: Have some more wine. Drink yourself a blanket.
Gallery Opening
San Francisco, California
Co-worker #1: Did you see that email [Henry] sent?
Co-worker #2 & #3: Yes.
Co-worker #1: What does he mean by “COB”?
Co-worker #2 & #3: Conclusion of business.
Co-worker #1: Oh, I was hoping it meant “commencement of breakfast.”
10900 Stonelake Boulevard
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: T the Munificent
Manager, explaining the loud sucking noises coming from her office: I'm sorry, it's so big it's hard not to slurp.
Santa Ana, California
Overheard by: That's What She Said
