Co-worker #1: Wow! That’s the longest email I’ve ever gotten from a customer.
Co-worker #2: Really? What is it?
Co-worker #1: [Kateunderscorelee]@yahoo.com
Co-worker #2: That’s not long…Oh! Um, do you know what an “underscore” is? You don’t spell it out.
1001 Roeder Avenue
Bellingham, Washington
Overheard by: Chris Shard
Employee on phone with customer: I just need to do a couple of other things, cross my Xs and circle my Os. Then I can get back to you.
Staten Island, New York
Overheard by: That Staten Island Guy
Cube dweller #1: She looks like the bride of Frankenstein.
Cube dweller #2: Who’s Brian Frankenstein?
Chesapeake, Virginia
Overheard by: head:desk
Teen girl, holding a bag with a dead bird inside: My grandfather called earlier about getting this bird checked for West Nile virus. He found it in his yard.
Office clerk: Ok, I remember talking to him this morning. I need to get some information from you first. Now, what was his name?
The girl’s eyes get big, and she looks at the bag.
Office clerk: No, not the bird’s name. I need to know your grandfather’s name.
616 Court Street
Oberlin, Louisiana
Overheard by: Vicky
Director #1: [Beth], sit over here!
Director #2: Yeah [Beth], this is the power row.
2111 North Haskell Avenue
Dallas, Texas
CSR: Ma’am, my system is backed up and my computer is going down on me.
300 Rosewood Drive
Danvers, Massachusetts
Engineer on phone to pumper: You gotta have the sucking and the blowing. (pause) Does he have liquid? (pause) That's why you gotta keep on blowing and sucking. (pause) Yeah, great, thanks.
Dallas, Texas
Boss, to friend: So then I took her out to my car and let little Spiderman fire his web shooter all over her fa…
Employee, from back in the stockroom: Aaaaaaaaaaaaarghh! Jesus Christ, I'm quitting.
Hot Topic
West Virginia
Overheard by: oh dear
Eager presenter: We need people who can walk the talk and live the walk.
Kirtland, Ohio
Overheard by: street smart, no street genuis!
Manager: So Mike* is leaving.
Office peon #1: Will anyone notice? What does he do, anyway?
Office peon #2: He's a fluffer.
Office peon #1: What?!
Office peon #2: What? He, y'know, fluffs out his job so it looks like he's doing more than he is.
Manager to office peon #1: After the meeting, you explain.
Brisbane
Australia
Overheard by: EarleyDaysYet
