College girl #1: We just hung out last night.
College girl #2: Sure! (giggles) What is that? (points to friend's hair)
College girl #1: What? I still have cum in my hair!
Barnes & Noble
Colorado Springs, Colorado
College girl #1: We just hung out last night.
College girl #2: Sure! (giggles) What is that? (points to friend's hair)
College girl #1: What? I still have cum in my hair!
Barnes & Noble
Colorado Springs, Colorado
Woman on cell in shoe store, sighing: Yes, honey, I'm still at the DMV, the lines are horrendous!
Buena Park Mall
Buena Park, California
Overheard by: Glad I'm not married to her
Worker on phone: Yes, ma’am, we’ll get you what you need right away… Well, thank you, Linda*. We enjoy your business. You’re one of my favorite customers. Without you our company would suffer a tremendous loss. Okay… Thank you. [Hangs up.] Bitch.
7501 NE Loop 820
Texas
Overheard by: lmao
IT worker in bathroom: Out of all the people I could impersonate electronically, you would be my favorite!
Columbus, Ohio
CSR: Today needs to be over. I’m so seriously ready to slit my wrists–
The phone rings.
CSR: Good afternoon. This is [Nelly], how can I help you? Oh…hi! How are you doing?…Oh, I’m great! Mm-hmm, yes, of course! I just have to pull up your previous order…Oh, really? Oh! Well, that’s okay!…No, really!…Oh, stop it! Ha, ha! Okay, well thanks for calling anyway! Yes…Thank you, I will! You also, okay? M’kay, bye!…Jesus. Okay, so, what the fuck was I saying again?
950 Tower Lane
Foster City, California
Chubby worker to young girl: Your hat is so cute! My niece would love it. Where did you get it?
Young girl in beaded hat: Limited Too!
Chubby worker, after girl has left: I don't have a niece. I will have that hat!
Chestnut Hill, Massachusetts
Teacher: Just pretend it's Russian and nail it.
Bowling Green, Ohio
Marketing drone: There is an island near New Guinea where all the animals are small. There is a pygmy puma that survives on moths.
(silence from marketing room)
Marketing drone: Moths!
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Sumi
Coworker #1: We should have a race to see who can put the windows in faster!
Coworker #2: Wait, does anyone even know how to put windows in?
Coworker #3, making inappropriate hand motions: I do! You just put it in the hole and nail it!
Pekin, Illinois
Girl #1: I hate our supervisor and her stupid flicky long hair.
Girl #2: I just want to go up to her and just cut her hair off.
Guy: I just want to cut her throat.
Girl #1: I would love to do that, but it's illegal.
Guy: So would cutting her hair, unless you were her hairdresser.
Girl #2: I can just see it now?
Guy: When you go to court?
Girl: When I cut her hair, I was actually aiming for her throat, for this, your honor, I am…
Together: Extremely sorry.
Sydney
Australia
