Health & Hygiene

Coworker on phone to business contact: So, are you talking about fecal year 2008 or 2009?

Toronto
Canadia

Overheard by: analyst

Caller: I am calling about a claim that was denied last week.
Insurance customer service: Which claim is that, ma'am?
Caller: The one from my doctor's visit while we were in Hawaii.
Insurance customer service: Well, ma'am, your policy doesn't cover international medical claims–so your doctor's visit in Hawaii wouldn't be covered.

Denver, Colorado

Repair tech: My customer just called in and told me that his trans-vaginal probe is vibrating.
Cube dweller: And that's a problem because…?

Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

Line cook: Man, did you fart?! Uhhh! That stinks!
Cute waitress: No, that's my breath.

Orlando, Florida

Overheard by: Marcus

Colleague to another who has been ill: Your doctor's sick note looks like it came from a vending machine.

Cape Town
South Africa

Assistant #1: I want to stab my eyes out. Is that normal?
Assistant #2: Yes.
Assistant #1: Just wanted to make sure.

640 5th Avenue
New York, NY

Female coworker: That's it. I'm going to the store and get some tampons. I'm tired of stuffing toilet paper in me.

Charlottesville, Virginia

Nurse: I hate you, you're so skinny.
Patient: I have Crohn's disease.

Toronto
Canadia

Overheard by: another patient

Female clerk: Did you eat yet?
Male clerk: Yeah, I’ve been here since 1:30.
Female clerk: Ooh! Then can I lint-brush you?

Convenience Store
Brighton, Massachusetts

Convenience store worker #1: This coffee area is a mess.
Convenience store worker #2, at cash register: I just cleaned my butt off on Sunday.

Grand Rapids, Michigan

Overheard by: Rob W