Man: Why are you allowing a day spa? I didn’t think you allowed day spas in this town. When you have day spas you attract people who get facials, and we don’t want those kinds of people in this town!
Redlands City Hall
Redlands, California
Man: Why are you allowing a day spa? I didn’t think you allowed day spas in this town. When you have day spas you attract people who get facials, and we don’t want those kinds of people in this town!
Redlands City Hall
Redlands, California
Coworker: I was in a car accident once, but it wasn’t my fault because I was asleep.
1855 South Grant Street
San Mateo, California
Overheard by: Not carpooling anymore
Thrift store connoisseur: Well, I don’t like underwear with stains anyway…
19043 Wentworth Avenue
Lansing, Illinois
Overheard by: Rusti
Black woman on cell: All he did was look at my vagina, and I owe him 300 dollars?
Federal Credit Union, 2nd Avenue and Chestnut Street
Louisville, Kentucky
Coworker: So, this woman at my church just had twins, except she had three of them.
Rockville, Maryland
Overheard by: fly on the wall
AP woman: You look like you’re getting your figure back.
AR woman: I’m trying — I’ve become obsessed with BJs.
Richmond Road
Bedford Heights, Ohio
Health clinic employee: That woman is one kooky cracker!
Manager: I would really appreciate it if you wouldn’t call our patients ‘kooky.’
Health clinic employee: But you and Dr. Horowitz* call patients ‘crazy’ all the time. What’s the difference between ‘kooky’ and ‘crazy’?
Manager: I just don’t want you to call our patients ‘kooky.’
Health clinic employee: It’s still alright to call them ‘crackers’ though, right?
104 Market Street
Chapel Hill, North Carolina
Female accountant: I’m allergic to chocolate.
CFO: Really? My daughter is allergic to — how does she put it — ‘Wrinkly nuts.’
7887 E Belleview Avenue
Englewood, Colorado
Overheard by: Did anyone else hear that?
CFO: Our budget has been balanced the last few years because of unpaid maternity leaves, and we are working that into our models for coming years.
Committee member: So our financial solvency is based on people in the company having sex?
CFO: Basically.
Klaipeda
Lithuania
Guy #1: Hey, you don’t look so great.
Guy #2: Yeah, I’m sick, I think I might throw up.
Guy #1: I’ve thrown up lots of times at work… but I was hung-over.
Downtown, Boston, MA
