Boss: My daughter used to have a friend when she was little. The kid's mom was from Sweden and the dad was from Slovenia, one of those countries in…where is it again?
Admin: Eastern Europe.
Boss: Exactly, one of those Indian countries.
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: workingwithmorons
Blonde, ditzy coworker: Well, why would they send gloves? Babies are born without thumbs. Even I know that, and I don't have any children!
Westport, Connecticut
Mailroom boy #1: And they say chivalry's dead.
Mailroom boy #2: What's “chivalry”?
Omaha, Nebraska
New project manager: Make it more…sciency.
Chemist: Sciency?
Project manager: You know, truthier.
Chemist: Did you have a stroke?
Project manager: This is just my project management style.
Mississauga
Ontario
Canadia
Woman on personal call: Oh, wow, they really talk like that? Y'all? (pause) I'm not sure I'd want to live down there. I can't believe they haven't learned how to talk yet!
West Warwick, Rhode Island
Cube rat #1: My son asked me last night what happens if the President dies. Does the Vice President really take over? I wasn't sure what to tell him.
Cube rat #2: Yeah, I believe that is what happens, or maybe they hold another election to re-choose the President.
Cube rat #1: I guess it is hard to tell, since it has never happened before.
Cube rat #2: Yep.
San Diego, California
Overheard by: Poking my eyes out
Young cutie receptionist: Oh, fun, we get to dress up in costumes.
HR clerk: What are you talking about?
Young cutie receptionist: Well, if Andy can be at work dressed as a pirate, I should be able to wear a my kitten costume.
HR clerk: Andy got a metal filing in his eye. He went to the doctor and his eye is bandaged. Andy is not dressed as a pirate!
Young cutie receptionist: Does that mean the only way I can get to wear my kitten costume is if a doctor puts it on me?
Pearl, Mississippi
Overheard by: Brain Dancing
Man #1, discussing peanut usage in Asia: Peanuts are not native to Asia! The peanut was invented by George Washington Carver!
Man #2: That is completely false! You cannot invent a peanut, you can only discover it, and that happened way before George Washington Carver…he invented peanut butter.
Man #1: Listen, I am not a man of pride, but I know this much: George Washington Carver was a good man and he invented the peanut by using cross-breeding! This is what I have been told my whole life!!
Man #3: I'm googling that business right now. (uses BlackBerry) Wow, that man was obsessed with peanuts!
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Someone clearly struck a cord with this topic
Evil woman: So I heard this question on the radio this morning: would you rather be fat and someone think you're pregnant, or someone think you are a prostitute? That's just retarded, because you can fix pregnant…and fat. You can't fix prostitute.
St Louis, Missouri
20-something blonde: It sure is cold out here today. I heard it will be one of the coldest days in the last 30 years.
Argumentative VP: No, it doesn't seem too cold today. I can usually tell when it's very cold because my glasses fog up.
20-something blonde: Ummmmmm…you're not wearing glasses.
Argumentative VP: Oh…that's a good point.
Beachwood, Ohio
Overheard by: The Cleveland Kid
