As Spicy As Videoconferencing Ever Gets

Remote office: DC, have you got it up yet?
DC office: We've got it up, now we're trying to make it bigger.

Washington, DC

Posted on June 12, 2009
Body Parts, Coworkers, On the phone, Sexuality, Washington DC, Weirdness

And You Say I Never Share My Emotions, Honey.

Cube rat on phone: I hate those poops that leave you feeling like you spent a night in jail!

Fairbanks, Alaska

Posted on June 11, 2009
Alaska, Compare and contrast, Employees, Feelings, Health & Hygiene, On the phone, Weirdness

How Many Guests on The O'Reilly Factor Feel

Female coworker on phone with manager: Yes, I know it's an impossible request. (pause) I don't know, either he thinks he's freakin' Jesus or he thinks I am. Either way, I'm about to get a cheap, perverse thrill out of crushing his entire belief system.

Chelmsford, Massachusetts

Overheard by: I think I'm Santa

Posted on June 9, 2009
Bosses, Employees, Massachusetts, Offers and requests, On the phone, Religion, Weirdness

…Now You Said You Want a Big Mac, Large Fries, and a Coke?

Man on phone: The money is the same either way…but this time, no one goes to jail.

Los Angeles, California

Posted on June 5, 2009
California, Compare and contrast, Crimes, Money, On the phone, Weirdness

Says the Chick Who Calls a Party a “Potty”?

Woman on personal call: Oh, wow, they really talk like that? Y'all? (pause) I'm not sure I'd want to live down there. I can't believe they haven't learned how to talk yet!

West Warwick, Rhode Island

Posted on June 5, 2009
General Idiocy, Language barrier, On the phone, Questions, Rhode Island

…Just Charge the Penis Enlarger to My Corporate Account

Loud HR director on “confidential” call: At the risk of sounding unethical…

Charlotte, North Carolina

Posted on June 3, 2009
Bosses, Human Resources, North Carolina, On the phone, Weirdness

Sorry About the Potted Plant in the Office, by the Way.

Coworker, on voicemail: It started yesterday before I left work, but it just got worse and I spent all night on the toilet. Well, on and off the toilet, it was coming out of both ends if you know what I mean. Anyway, I'll spare you the gory details. Suffice it to say I'm going to be working from home today. I need to lie back and relieve some of this pressure in my abdomen.

Denver, Colorado

Posted on May 29, 2009
Body Parts, Colorado, Coworkers, Health & Hygiene, On the phone, Restroom

He Sits Around All Day, Thinking These Up

Admin to office manager: Do you want to talk to Michelle with ABC company?
Office manager: No, just put her in my voice mail.
Admin, picking up call: Michelle, she's actually at a karate tournament right now. Can I put you in her voice mail?

Nashville, Tennessee

Posted on May 25, 2009
Admins, Bosses, On the phone, Questions, Sports, Tennessee

And Should I Be Sitting in Front Of a Computer for This?

Tech support rep: Okay, so go ahead and type in the url in the address bar.
Customer: Okay, uh, um, should I be on the internet?
Tech support rep: Yes.
Customer: Okay. Um. Okay. So uh, should I google “internet”?

Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: loves three way calling and the mute button

Posted on May 6, 2009
Dumb Customers, General Idiocy, Internet, Massachusetts, On the phone, Questions, Tech People, Technology, Words

Tonight: The Hardy Boys and the Can Opener Mystery

Manager on phone with kids: You two need to work out this SpaghettiO's issue on your own. I'm in a meeting!

Austin, Texas

Overheard by: CubeRat

Posted on May 1, 2009
Bosses, Family, Kids, Meals and Snacks, Meetings, On the phone, Texas

On the phone