CSR on phone: Sir, would you mind slowing down just a little bit?You’re really giving me a lot of information, and it’s not really
registering in my brain because I’m still trying to type in all the
other crap you told me.
5129 Beverly Glen Village Lane
Norcross, Georgia
Worker: Dude, come look at my cubicle.
Manager: You mean you weren’t working?
Worker: No, I had to decorate.
1700 Market Street
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Tech Support: Okay, I need you to go to a command prompt and type
“‘mail from:’ your email address” and this should get you a connection.
User: It didn’t work.
Tech Support: Okay, so you typed “‘mail from:’ your email address” and it didn’t work for you?
User: Wait a minute. Did you say you wanted me to type “nail” or “mail”?
1010 Niagara Street
Buffalo, New York
Marketer: There’s nothing sexy about turkey.
Writer: No.
Marketer: What about, “Need a way to keep from stuffing yourself? Go have an orgasm!”
8885 Venice Boulevard
Los Angeles, California
Musician: Nice of you to join us.
Exec: Well, you were 30 minutes late; I went to take a shit!
Musician: You’re entitled to that.
Exec: I washed my hand if you want to shake it.
875 6th Avenue
New York, NY
Overheard by: N & S
Co-worker #1: I’m really tired this morning.
Co-worker #2: Why don’t you try Red Bull?
Co-worker #1: That stuff doesn’t work for me.
Co-worker #2: Well, have you ever tried it without the vodka?
2783 Lancashire Road
Cleveland Heights, Ohio
Woman: Don, can you hang this on the wall, because you are tall?
Man: I hate being tall… People are always asking me to do things. Maybe next time I drop a coin I will ask a midget to pick it up.
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Wholesale meat salesman to customer on phone: We've got 12-inch weiners on special.
Fairbank Road
Ashville, New York
Customer: I need the cold and flu meds that I have to be logged into a data base for.
Pharmacist: Well, can you tell me your symptoms?
Customer: Well, I'm sore and my head… it's like my whole head is just like… like someone sat on my face… but not in a good way.
(pharmacist gives deadpan face and goes to get meds)
Customer: You know, like a big fat person sat on my face… head. Do you take debit?
Mandeville, Louisiana
Overheard by: ShiftSuper2theSTARS
