Health & Hygiene

Crazed, frazzled receptionist, yelling: A little Vicodin goes a long way!

Manhattan, New York

Overheard by: EMCEE

85-year-old client: I’ve been sick all morning but I’ll tell you what: the best way to cure diarrhea is by drinking wine!
Sales manager on phone: Oh… Um… Really?

Hotel
Dulles, Virginia

Overheard by: Rather Disgusted

Staffer: Oh, great! The water bottles are in!
Executive, opening bottle and sniffing it: It smells like cancer.

38th Street and 8th Avenue
New York, New York

Overheard by: Sarah

Coworker #1, dropping summer sausage for lunch: Hey, you want some of my sausage?
Coworker #2: Only if you wash it off first.

Bourbonnais, Illinois

Overheard by: the closet is my office

Cube dweller: Just like men can get breast cancer, women can get prostate cancer. My gynecologist screens all his patients for it.

North Carolina

Overheard by: Not too worried about it

Nurse #1: And I don’t know. I just started having this anxiety attack.
Nurse #2: Well, on the bright side, I just made a Klan hood for my finger.

Royal Oak, Michigan

Potential new hire: Hi, I'm Julie.
Existing employee Nice to meet you. Congratulations.
Potential new hire: Thanks. I hope it works out.
Existing employee: Okay then. Get well soon.

Charlestown, Massachusetts

Cubicle worker with a cold: I've been sucking on Fisherman's Friends all day and it's not helping.

Sedro-Woolley, Washington

Young mother pushing baby carriage to old woman holding door for her: Oh, thanks. I think about how hard it must be for people in wheelchairs, but I think this is worse, because I always have so much to carry.

Kent, Ohio

Overheard by: elizabetz

Employee #1: Look at all that food you have there.
Employee #2: It’s going to give me a heart attack, but I love it; especially all the greasy bacon and sausage.
Employee #3: I wish I knew someone who knows CPR in case you have a coronary.
Employee #2: [Sean] and [Gina] are medics, they should know CPR.
Employee #1: What do they know about CPR? They are ambulance drivers.

2727 Walker Avenue NW
Grand Rapids, Michigan