Office drone: Ahhhh crap! I peed on the floor. If I knew I was going to pee on the floor today, I’d never have come to work.
From within a Stall in the Men’s Restroom, Office Building
Rochester, Minnesota
Office drone: Ahhhh crap! I peed on the floor. If I knew I was going to pee on the floor today, I’d never have come to work.
From within a Stall in the Men’s Restroom, Office Building
Rochester, Minnesota
Insurance salesman: Maternity is covered as a sickness under this policy.
39th Avenue
Hollywood, Florida
Male program manager: I got a hair in my mouth…[pulls it out] Gross…
Male manager: It’s not mine, I don’t have any down there.
Redmond, Washington
Overheard by: uhhh…what?
Nurse, screening for life insurance: So tell me about your siblings…
Male worker: Well, I have 3 sisters, two older and one who’s a twin. I’m the youngest by two minutes.
Nurse: Oh, really? You have a twin sister? Are you identical?
Male worker: Are you serious? You’re a professional nurse and you’re asking me if I’m identical to my twin sister? Is this screening over because I’ve got work to do.
Tacoma, Washington
Overheard by: Stan Green
Employee’s daughter: Sometimes I like to lick my jacket!
1114 6th Avenue
New York, New York
Overheard by: Kelly
Worker #1: I’m feeling a little premenstrual.
Worker #2: Jesus, didn’t you just have your period?
Worker #1: Right! I had yours and mine!
365 West Passaic Street
Rochelle Park, New Jersey
Medical assistant trying to make appointment for patient: Tell me something — why is the Gastrology office always so backed up?
Greenville, South Carolina
Overheard by: Mary
Cubicle chick: Are your boobs real?
2710 Marvin Road
Olympia, Washington
Male peon: You feeling better today, Jim*?
Jim: Yes.
Male peon: Well, you look a lot better. We were worried about you yesterday. You were turning white.
Jim: Yeah, that’s not a good sign when you’re a black man.
Newport News, Virginia
Boss: Brandon*, no matter what you think, those pills will not make you grow three inches. Get back to work.
55th Street and 3rd Avenue
New York, New York
