General Idiocy

Salon receptionist: How can I help you?
Girl: I would like to schedule an appointment for acrylic nails.
Salon receptionist: Okay, can I get your first and last name?
Girl: Sure, it's Lindsay… (long pause) …I forgot the second question.

San Diego, California

Overheard by: Really…?!

Newswriter to whole room: I've always wondered something. When they say the space shuttle is returning to earth on Saturday, is it also Saturday in space? Or do you think it's a different day up there?

Gainesville, Georgia

Overheard by: not sure what i'm doing here

Girl, during meeting: Meeting adjourned!
Boss: Actually, that's at the end of the meeting.
Girl: Oh, I thought it was like “aloha.”

Minneapolis, Minnesota

Overheard by: bryan b

Pregnant employee at coworker's baby shower: Oh, an anti-roll pillow! Thank you!
Male employee: What's it for?
Pregnant employee: To keep the baby from rolling onto his stomach and possibly suffocating in the crib.
Chatty woman: My two babies died from sleeping on their stomachs.
(stunned silence)
Chatty woman: Just kidding! (laughs)

Orlando, Florida

Overheard by: office monkey extraordinaire

Connecting Across the Room Is Close Enough

Work study employee: So then this guy looks at me, and starts talking about tantra and leering at me, right?
Coworker: What in the hell is tantra?
Work study employee: (explains briefly)
Coworker: God, so it's not even kinky, it's just damn boring. Who the hell wants to connect on a deeper level? Shit.

Eastern Washington University
Cheney, Washington

Tech support rep: Okay, so go ahead and type in the url in the address bar.
Customer: Okay, uh, um, should I be on the internet?
Tech support rep: Yes.
Customer: Okay. Um. Okay. So uh, should I google “internet”?

Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: loves three way calling and the mute button

Pilot: We have two great flight attendants, and one that you'll find is only so-so.

Flight over Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: AL

Boss to secretary: We're out of paper? Hold on, I'll call Julie and have her fax me a sheet and we can photo copy it.

Fort Lauderdale, Florida

Overheard by: can't say … I'm laughing to hard

Interviewer: So what else can you tell about yourself?
Interviewee: I am a very hard worker and learnative.

Menlo Park, California

Girl #1, looking at wedding pictures: Is that the girl that got married? (points at girl in wedding dress and veil)
Girl #2: Did you seriously just ask that?

Little Rock, Arkansas