IT drone to coworker: They're being invaded by blackberries, papayas and pygmy goats.
Coworker: Wow, that's rough. I've heard that that's a problem.
IT drone: Yeah, the goats especially.
Austin, Texas
IT drone to coworker: They're being invaded by blackberries, papayas and pygmy goats.
Coworker: Wow, that's rough. I've heard that that's a problem.
IT drone: Yeah, the goats especially.
Austin, Texas
Obnoxious 20-something IT guy to another: Oh, look, here's another set with cats as the background, aren't they just adorable?
Middle-aged librarian lady, overhearing: Da Vinci drew those cats. (pause) And they'll rip your fucking head off.
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: marion the other librarian
Customer: I would like a cheeseburger combo, no cheese.
Cashier, looking confused, to coworker: Hey, bro… What's a cheeseburger with no cheese?
Coworker: Are you serious, man?
Irvine, California
Overheard by: Jennifer
Beastly employee: That reminds me of when I was skinny. I was smoking. With my thigh-high boots.
Pretty employee: Mmmm… cool.
Beastly employee: I won’t ever wear them again. I am too fat. I will bring them in for you.
Pretty employee, unhappily: Ummmm… ok.
Passerby employee to pretty employee, sympathetically: The boots went up to her camel toe… I’m sorry.
Hawthorne, New York
Overheard by: I have my own office
40-something male colleague: Oh, Sunday was no-pants day! Did you participate?
20-something female intern: Yes, but not intentionally!
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
50-something office lady: And kissing these days is so different… These kids!
Dayton, Ohio
Lady in break room: I had the strangest dream last night. I dreamed I had gone out to my backyard, dug up my dog and took off its head and put it on my mantle.
Dallas, Texas
Overheard by: Rob
Male manager to female employees: The black currant vanilla separates the men from the boys.
Idaho
Male office manager: Go into the gent's toilets and see what type of hand towels they use.
Female PA: I don't want people thinking I'm a pervert!
Male office manager: You may be a pervert, but you're a genius at connecting conference calls… Your job is safe.
Female PA: But I'm not a pervert!
Newcastle
England
Overheard by: …she is a bit of a pervert!
