Male peon: Well, now we all know you’re a ho.
Office girl: I prefer the term ‘prostitute.’
Golden Square, London
England
Engineer #1: Are we really sure this is the best tool for what we’re doing?
Manager, shrugging: We’re eating our own dog food.
Engineer #2: We are not. It’s more like we’re feeding dog food to our cats.
411 1st Avenue South
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: engineer #3
Coworker #1, standing at urinal: What's up dude, I was just thinking about you!
Coworker #2, entering bathroom: Oh, that's creepy.
Coworker #1: Well, uh… Yeah, I guess it is.
Santa Barbara, California
Worker #1: Did you know there was a midget in our building?
Worker #2: Hiding?
Worker #1: No, working on three, asshole.
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Paralegal #1: When there is a hurricane, do you know why they tell you to fill up your bathtubs?
Paralegal #2: I think it’s because the water in the bathtub will hold down the floor.
1633 Broadway
New York, NY
Overheard by: No Double Posts
Cleaning lady, about deaf cleaning guy: I'm hiding up here from Tim–he wants me to help him clean that suite downstairs before the new company moves in. I don't wanna help him, cuz he never listens!
Columbus, Ohio
Shift supervisor: What are you doing?
Intense coworker: Working on my sparkle.
Shift supervisor: Your what?
Intense coworker: Once I sparkle, all the girls will want me! (turns to female coworker) C'mon, do I dazzle you?
Wellington
New Zealand
Overheard by: Still Not Dazzled
Office girl: No one go in the ladies’ room. The Bathroom Bomber strikes again.
1520 Front Street
Yorktown Heights, NY
Overheard by: miss earwell
Food court employee #1: I think I have a lizard tail growin’ out of my butt!
Food court employee #2: Oh, I see it!
Allegheny College
Meadville, Pennsylvania
Woman to coworker: Why is it called a short story?
San Diego, California
Overheard by: Mike
