Co-worker #1: User Name is your username, and Password is your password.
Co-worker #2: That sounds easy enough.
Co-worker #1: .And if you forget, I have it on a yellow stickie.
75 Hawthorne Street
San Francisco, California
Co-worker #1: User Name is your username, and Password is your password.
Co-worker #2: That sounds easy enough.
Co-worker #1: .And if you forget, I have it on a yellow stickie.
75 Hawthorne Street
San Francisco, California
Supervisor (in a sing-song voice): Sex with Steven is more boring than church.
Employee #1: (humming along)
Supervisor: Sex with Steven is like…a handjob during Golden Girls.
Employee #1: Sex with Steven is like getting off on a baby carrot.
Employee #2: A baby pickle.
Employee #1: Whatever. Sex with Steven is…like an orgy with old people.
(pause)
Supervisor : You took it too far.
Hamilton
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: some girl.
Employee to coworker who won't stop talking: Oh, yeah, you get all mouthy now. But when the auditors come by, you get quiet and have diarrhea.
Melbourne, Florida
Overheard by: factory drone
Not so bright coworker: Yeah, I'll probably let my daughter get a tattoo when she turns 16… If she really knows what she wants. I'll even pay for it.
Des Moines, Iowa
Overheard by: coolerthanme
Admin: What time is it in France?
Worker: I think it’s February.
Admin: Really?
3239 Satellite Boulevard
Duluth, Georgia
Co-worker on phone: I’m “kvetching”…ha, ha…well, I guess you’re kvetching…ha ha ha…we’re…ha ha…we’re kvetching together…wait, what does “kvetching” mean?
175 5th Avenue
New York, NY
Office lady #1: Should I rent Transamerica? I heard it was a comedy. I’m worried about handling the whole sex change thing. How can that be funny?
Office lady #2: I recommend it, but it’s about a personal journey — it’s not a comedy.
Office lady #1: Is it funny?
Rochelle Park, New Jersey
Office drone #1: Yeah, and Hercules lost all his strength when he got his hair cut.
Office drone #2: Do you mean Hercules or Samsung?
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: DelilahWorkedforSony
CPR instructor: … And how do we tell if an infant isn’t breathing? He will flail around a little and will also turn blue or purple.
Black cop: Um, not trying to be an ass, but what if the baby is my color?
White cop: Oh yeah… That’s known as blurple.
CPR Class, Police Department
Colorado Springs, Colorado
