Coworkers

Web Developer: Nobody ever made money off the internet with a business model that required two hands!

845 High Street
Palo Alto, California

Co-worker #1: You should get that fan fixed. It’s really loud.
Co-worker #2: I don’t mind it.
Co-worker #1: It’s really loud.
Co-worker #2: I don’t mind. I just pretend I’m working in my private jet at 30,000 feet. It’s noisy for a computer fan but it’s really quiet for a jet.

2137 Highway 35
Holmdel, New Jersey

Overheard by: Chuck Roast

Worker #1: Are we still on for lunch at the strip club on Wednesday?
Worker #2: You bet. Is there really a lunch buffet there?

4 Gateway Center
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Matt

Co-worker: Here comes trouble.
Boss: Get back in your box and shut the lid.
Co-worker: I *am* in my box. I was just sitting here and you came in my box!

10398 Pacific Center Court
San Diego, California

Clinical Services Manager: I hate it when my email is full of porn!
Clinical Services Assistant: Well, at least it’s not kiddie porn.
Clinical Services Manager: Wait, they make porn with cats in it now?

999 Home Plaza
Waterloo, Iowa

Overheard by: RicaChica

Plumber #1: So what about Jeanette?
Plumber #2: She pisses me off, man. That bitch pisses me off so much I want to cut her into little pieces. You know what I mean?
Plumber #1: I know what you mean.

Translated from the Spanish.

145 East 35th Street
New York, NY

Overheard by: Spooner

Worker #1: Do you have any time available to meet on Thursday?
Worker #2: It will be pretty tough; I have back to back meetings all day.
Worker #1: How about 11AM?
Worker #2: Okay, I have nothing scheduled at all between 9AM and 5PM.

140 Broadway
New York, NY

Overheard by: HardlyWorking

Co-worker #1: Make sure you eat some of the leftovers from the potluck.
Co-worker #2: Okay.
Co-worker #1: And you’d better hurry before [Nick] and [Sara] get in there and stuff their faces. They give pigs a bad name.

10011 109th Street
Edmonton, Alberta
Canadia

VP: There is only so much you can do with one hand.
Co-worker: I’m not going to touch that.

910 Lousiana Street
Houston, Texas

Analyst #1: I hate going into that lunchroom when the people from claims are in there having a potluck.
Analyst #2: I know, it’s like the bar scene in Star Wars.

4645 East Cotton Center Bouelvard
Phoenix, Arizona