Co-worker #1: Hey! Stop calling me psycho!
Co-worker #2: Sorry sir, I didn’t know you could read my thoughts.
401 NW 4th Street
Evansville, Indiana
Co-worker #1: Hey! Stop calling me psycho!
Co-worker #2: Sorry sir, I didn’t know you could read my thoughts.
401 NW 4th Street
Evansville, Indiana
Coworker #1: We should start a D&D game.
Coworker #2: Yeah. Let’s ask Ben* if he wants to play, too!
Coworker #1, yelling to Ben: Hey, want to play D&D later?
Ben, yelling back: No! I don’t play D&D!
Coworker #2: We thought you’d be a good Druid.
Ben, yelling back: Fuck that, I’m a thief acrobat!
Oshkosh, Wisconsin
Overheard by: Will
Worker #1 on speaker: I was wondering why [Billy] hasn’t called me yet.
Worker #2 on speaker: I’ll go make sure he calls you this time.
Worker #1 on speaker: Do me a favor and punch him in the kidney as you walk by for me! Make him crap blood for a night so he can think it over.
1 Dell Way
Round Rock, Texas
Female marketing executive to male sales executive: Well, you can just suck my imaginary dick!
Research Boulevard
Rockville, Maryland
Coworker: Remember that one guy that we interviewed that wouldn't stop staring at Rachel*'s tits?
Madison, Wisconsin
Black co-worker: You smell good; what are you wearing?
White co-worker: White Shoulders. I’ve worn it since I was sixteen.
Black co-worker: Do they make Black Shoulders?
White co-worker: Oh, we’ll let you wear the White. This is America!
175 South Third Street
Columbus, Ohio
Drone #1: Are you sticking around for the 4PM meeting?
Drone #2: No, the batteries are dead in my wife’s stimulator and I have to do my husbandly duty…
Drone #1: Excuse me?
815 Allgood Road NE
Marietta, Georgia
Coworker #1: Did you watch The Office last night?
Coworker #2: Yeah, but I was pretty high, so I don’t remember if the parts that I thought were funny actually happened.
3rd Avenue
New York, New York
Overheard by: Bunny
Manager to lead: Go ahead and audit her drawer tonight. We're supposed to audit everyone once a week.
Cashier: Go ahead, since it'll be quick. How often are my drawers off anyway?
Passing coworker: Every. Night.
Lee's Summit, Missouri
Overheard by: Alicia
Coworker: His problem is that he has two perfectly good legs attached to an asshole. He needs to have his legs removed so he can be a whole asshole.
Manchester, Connecticut
Overheard by: very amused
