Older female accountant: You’re looking more like Burt Reynolds each day.
Younger male accountant: He’s old, what are you saying?
Older female accountant: No, like… In a good way… When he was sexy and young.
Younger male accountant: (silence)
Older female accountant: I should get back to work.
Independence, Ohio
19-year-old receptionist to middle aged salesman: I love your hat -I would totally wear it if I were drunk.
111 Street, Fort St John
British Columbia, Canadia
Overheard by: Mama C
Attractive customer specialist #1: So how was your trip to Italy?
Attractive customer specialist #2: Gorgeous! So many hot Italian guys. I’ve got so much more space between my thighs now too!
Waterfront Area
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Planning my next trip
IT guy to IT manager: Nice shoes, are they new?
IT manager: Yeah, but they’re too clean and white. They need to be scuffed up more.
IT guy: You know what they should do? They should make the seven-year old Taiwanese kids who sew these wear them for a few days first.
IT manager: Yeah, that’s perfect. Pre-scuffed shoes. They’d be flopping around in shoes way too big, but at least they’d have shoes for a few days.
Good Hope Road
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Sales rep: Mmmm… This is good. What is this? Harry and David. Oh… So it’s that kind of thing. No, I think they’re brothers, actually.
Forsyth Road
Macon, Georgia
Middle management moron: Ha, yes you’d look good in a nappy.
Long-suffering fellow goon: I don’t know what disturbs me more: the thought of *me* in a nappy, or the thought of *you* thinking about me in a nappy.
Osborne Park
Western Australia
Woman: I really enjoyed your singing this morning.
Girl who sang: Thanks so much!
Woman: Yeah, it’s always so great when someone just sings straight from the ovaries like that.
Girl who sang: Uhh… [Nervous laugh.]
Hotel
Orlando, Florida
Overheard by: Annah
Coworker #1: So what’s your e-mail address?
Coworker #2: [Gives it to him.]Coworker #1: Cool… How did you choose that?
Coworker #2: Oh, it means “big fart” in Chinese…
Santa Rosa, California
Female employee: [Burps loudly.]Male employee: Ooh, sexy! [Singing.] She’s a lady! Whoa whoa whoa!
Boylston Street
Boston, Massachusetts
Manager: We’re getting married in Gibraltar.
Designer: Oh, that sounds nice.
Manager: You know, you’ve heard of Gibraltar. Rocks… Monkeys… Except I don’t like monkeys. I don’t want monkeys in my wedding!
UNC-Chapel Hill
Chapel Hill, North Carolina
